G3Tfilms

Earth Wind Fire Advertising

2009-08-24T12:32:00.001+10:00

Gosh, I get here once a month these days... so, until next month, here, enjoy.

Created by 12 experimental film-makers from Sydney Film School over the course of a weekend, Earth Wind Fire Advertising started its life by being watched by you, me, and all cinema goers as it was played through the projectors of local cinemas as Cinema Advertisements. The group sourced the 35mm film prints once the advertising campaigns were no longer running and then set to work on them with a variety of substances and techniques.

The group scratched, bleached, sanded, painted, covered in oven cleaner, cut out parts of frames, dripped on industrial strength hydrochloric acid, melted with soldering irons, and even set the film prints on fire (to name but a few techniques) to re-engineer the Adverts to create new meanings or destroy all meaning; and to create enticing visual effects. Basically, we wanted to see what new emotions and feelings we could discover in the everyday world of advertising... Oh, and it was also a bucket load of fun.

Earth Wind Fire Advertising was edited by a single individual (who was probably me) with the philosophy of image before meaning and meaning before story; creating a painterly quality intended to relax the viewer and wash away the cynicism felt towards the original advertisements.

The film is set the music of Minnesotan experimental musician Richard Knutson and his group Plum Flower Embroidery.

I am the best... officially. No really, offically the best

2009-07-20T12:34:00.004+10:00

Sorry I haven't been around much. This film caper... It's a never ending series of heart breaking problems that must be solved two minutes before they happen. I'm not sure why any of us do it.

For the awards of course! Not really. Clemency and Talisker's showing at the film festival was less than auspicious. We had two issues happen outside our control that couldn't be fixed before the screening. The first being that our negative 'somehow' got dirty which resulted in bright white speckles all over our beautiful dark interiors. Some of it was like a fireworks display. The second being that our Telecine House provided us with a file in the wrong aspect ratio which made the film look like crap for it's showing. Not to worry, both problems will be fixed for the next screening.

But of course, that didn't stand in the way of our film receiving recognition, we managed to pick up Best Editor, Best Sound Designer and of course... Best Producer! Because as it says in the title, out of 51 films in competition, I'm the Best! I was also voted Least Humble! ;)

Seriously though, my reward really is to see the absolute best film up on the screen and although I was a little disappointed with its showing the feedback we received was very complementary indeed.

As for feedback being great, we had another film in the festival called Earth Wind Fire Advertising which was an experimental piece created by twelve of us SFS guys, edited by myself to the awesome tune Smoke and Oil by our good friend (fiend) Ticharu. Experimental films are often ignored by audiences as they're a little too abstract for them. But the feedback was really remarkable. We had dozens of people approach us after the screening all with high praise and a multitude of questions as to how it had been made. Really was a fantastic screening, and there's a good chance we'll see it in another festival in a couple of months! Yeah!

Anyway, better hop... still more to do and work to catch up on. Hope everyone out there is doing great.

Proof that I'm the Best...
or at least a random photo of me doing something

Dir-Acting Exercise

2009-06-07T22:21:00.001+10:00

Hey, here's some fun! The Directing exercise from a couple of months ago.

It's in the can

2009-05-06T08:57:00.002+10:00

But what that is... well, it isn't perfect but it certainly is a film. Here are some of the photo's from the shoot taken by a couple of our crew members.

Heaps of fun. But still heaps of work to do. Hope everyone out there in blogland are doing well.

The clock is running

2009-03-25T12:01:00.003+11:00

It feels like such a long time since I've been on the blogs. Gosh, I don't even know where to begin.

I guess the last time I was here it was all about Directing. Well, the class itself went fantastically. It was wonderfully prepared and went off without a hitch. It was a lot of fun. The beer prop was particularly popular seeing as I somehow 'accidentally' managed to oversupply that prop and everyone had to have a beer at the end of class.

We also heard about our Directing pitch. Hardly surprising, I wasn't short-listed for one of the Directing roles. I was completely OK with that decision considering my pitch performance. What I didn't expect was that I would be nominated to be a Producer on a film. I said I would do the role but didn't want to Produce a particular film because it might be too challenging for a part-time student. Well, they had a challenge for me! So now I'm in charge of a production which needs to completely recreate 1800s Australian convict life. Where do you get 1800s Australia in 2009... that's what were frantically on the path to find out. And organise.

So, until the end of the Production my life has ended. Gone. Underneath a pile like this;

Hope everyone else is out there having a great a time as I am.

Dir-Acting Exercise

2009-03-13T09:54:00.003+11:00

For one of my Directing classes I have to write a short 1-2 minute piece that will be workshopped in class using fellow Directing students as our Actors. We're then going to film the piece. There was no way I was going to write a highly emotive piece and hope one of my fellow students could pull a tear out. I think that's asking a little too much.

You can read what I came up with below; but first, enjoy a little inspiration.

A HAT WITH NO BEER

Characters:
Charlie the Gent
Polite Gentleman
Large Gentleman

1. EXT. GENTLEMAN’S CLUB. EVENING.

Charlie walks past a sign that says, ‘Gentleman’s Club’. He considers for a moment and enters the Club.

2. INT. GENTLEMAN’S CLUB BAR. EVENING.

Charlie walks into the bar where the Large Gentleman and Polite Gentleman, who unlike Charlie both wear hats, sit at the bar. Charlie sits down at the bar on the far side of them. A beer is put in front of Charlie.

Charlie is about to take a sip when the Polite Gentleman clears his throat, taps Charlie on the shoulder and points to a sign above them that says, ‘All Gentlemen MUST wear Hat to be Served’.

Charlie feels the top of his hatless head. He looks longingly at his beer. The Polite Gentleman waggles his finger, ‘no’ and points to the sign. Charlie gets up and begins to leave. As he passes the Large Gentleman he swats the hat off his head. The Large Gentleman does not notice. Charlie picks up the hat and offers it back to the Large Gentleman who, without seeing Charlie has his hat, shoves Charlie away. Charlie turns to leave when he realises he has a hat. He puts it on and goes back to his seat at the bar.

The Large Gentleman goes to sip his beer and the Polite Gentleman clears his throat, taps the Large Gentleman on the shoulder and points to a sign above them that says, ‘All Gentlemen MUST wear Hat to be Served’. The Large Gentleman feels the top of his head, looks over at Charlie and realises Charlie is wearing his hat. He starts to reach over the top of the Polite Gentleman in an attempt to fight Charlie for the hat. Charlie cowers away while offering the hat to the Large Gentleman. The Large Gentleman takes it, puts it back on his head and sits down at his chair.

The Polite Gentleman mollifies the Large Gentleman by brushing off the shoulders of his jacket. Charlie, seeing the Polite Gentleman’s back is turned, sees his opportunity and sneakily takes the Polite Gentleman’s hat and puts it on his head.

All three settle back in to drink. Both Charlie and the Large Gentleman clear their throats, tap The Polite Gentleman on the shoulder and point to the sign above them that says, ‘All Gentlemen MUST wear Hat to be Served’.

The Polite Gentleman feels the top of his head and tries to fight both Charlie and the Large Gentleman to get one of the hats back. The Polite Gentleman realises this wasn’t wise as both Charlie and the Large Gentleman swing a single blow that knocks him off his feet.

Charlie and the Large Gentleman sit down to enjoy their beers. The Polite Gentleman gets unsteadily to his feet and leaves. They go to sip their beer. Charlie suddenly jumps up and points in the direction the Polite Gentleman has left. The Large Gentleman stands up looking for another fight from the Polite Gentleman. Charlie sneakily puts his hat under his shirt, takes off the Large Gentleman’s Hat and puts it on his head.

They sit back down. Charlie clears his throat, taps the Large Gentleman on the shoulder and points to the sign above them that says, ‘All Gentlemen MUST wear Hat to be Served’. While the Large Gentleman scratches his head looking towards the direction of the Polite Gentleman’s exit, Charlie draws all three beers in front of him.

[END]

Pitch Session

2009-03-10T08:38:00.004+11:00

Ever had your Sandcastle crumble halfway through.

linked from Sandcastle Matt on flickr

As per usual, that's how my pitch went...

Not that it went badly. In fact it was really well received. But my ability to think cognitively and remain unflustered were dramatically reduced. It's something that is integral to pitching well; being comfortable with those questions I have probably considered in putting the ideas together for the film but are unable to articulate under pitch conditions. I think what I really need is to attend some sort of public speaking or acting classes.

I have to say I was jealous of the North Americans who, as a natural part of their education system, do so much public speaking. The difference was palpable.

I guess that's it. The next pitch will be better, and the one after better than that, and so forth.

Closing the Loop Hole

2009-03-06T10:47:00.003+11:00

So, I thought I'd found, in the 35mm Animation elective, a way of Directing my own script (the Encapsulate one) this semester but I was chatting to the School Administrator and they still haven't been able to confirm whether the elective will go ahead or not. Something to do with no-one on planet earth (at least our little part of it) being able to run the expensive and expansive rig they use to shoot the animations. They're trying to convince either a Stop-motionist or a Digital Animator to come on board and take the elective but in a different format. Although I was trepidatious about giving up the flexibility computers (After-FX) allow I was really warming to the idea of doing a traditional animation. Let's hope they pull it out of the fire... or else I may actually have to work with real actors and cameras and the like. Wouldn't that be terrible :)

Also, I have 4 of my 5 minute pitch now locked in. All I need to do is figure which minute, of the 12 minutes of material I have left over, to put in there. Oh, and practice, practice, practice...

This was my last effort to Pitch a film...

S-kool!

2009-03-04T13:41:00.009+11:00

I have a pitching session coming up in a couple of days at school. Basically, I get to stand up in front of a large group of people and try to convince them that I can Direct one of the scripts that was written at the school last year. There's a lot of problems in film schools where if a Director is also the Writer their 'ownership' of the piece can cause all sorts of tensions with other crew because they 'know' their work better than anyone. Our school kicks that problem to the curb by saying in the first year you can't Direct your own script (shhh... I've found a loop hole).

Anyway, so I have to pitch for a script not of my own creating. Gosh, what is wrong with the youth of today. The scripts are; Sociopath, Anorexic, Nonsensical Lying Delusional who eats a chilli meal that somehow burst his appendix (unfortunately not a comedy), A smiling homicidal maniac who cuts up grannies & kiddies.

Nothing profound.

Nothing inspirational.

Nothing moving.

Not even a wry smile.

I'm going to pitch the Sociopath script as it's part of a clear genre, Thriller, from which to draw plenty of reference.

Not to mention, Anorexics sicken me, seriously if I never had to see another one I'd be completely happy.

Nonsensical Lying Delusional is, well, nonsensical and the script was full of spelling mistakes and ill researched ideas, ie."He makes a C sharp with his finger" *cough* I think you mean Bass Clef ya numbat.

And the Homicidal Manic script uses every moment to explore all pervading fear and, not only do I get enough of that from public speaking, it really has little character exposition. Oh, and the twist at the end... it's called a twist because you're not meant to see it coming *sigh*. B is for Boring.

So, if I start getting like a single white female who dresses like his dead mother in the attic in order to boil your bunny, please forgive. It's just that the youth of today don't realise you can write inspiring works as well as dark and nasty.

Encapsulate - Parents

2009-03-02T12:45:00.003+11:00

I was going to put up some more Encapsulate stuff, but the material I had in mind had to be put off in favour of work... I know, can you believe people actually expect me to do work for my money ;)

Anyway, so instead of putting up a whole new world, you'll just have to be satisfied with a quick portrait I did of the kindly overseers of the Pollen Factory. I actually imagine their barriers (I don't like that word; what should I call them? Call it a Control, maybe?) to be somewhat smoother than this and maybe more white than yellow. I like the idea that there are small gaps in their Control (not bad) which allow them avenues through which to work or talk or whatever...

Although there are many ways that people form an avenue through their Control; the easiest way I thought to describe how those gaps form would be that if a young child had a puppy, they would obviously want to play with each other and press against the Control. That mindful determined pressure would cause a gap to occur. My guess with children being introduced to a new pet the avenue would form fairly quickly, you could probably watch it happen. But when, say, two much older people meet it may take an enormous amount of time for that sort of reaction to occur, if it did at all... Does that make sense? Well, I it does to me. Mind you none of this would be verbally touched upon in the short I have in mind. It's good to know how it works though and I might show some of it visually as the community (not on the Pollen Factory but another Terrarium) decides on how to deal with the young person in the post below after his 'problem'.

Interestingly, he doesn't have a name yet... I wonder what it is? I guess I wont find out until there is a community that accepts him and gives him one.

Anyway, I've got this work thing to do... I think I'd much prefer to work on this type of thing instead.

Encapsulate: Through the void

2009-02-25T14:53:00.004+11:00

So, here is an updated, coloured, version of one of the cities, the Pollen Factory (apparently it makes good food), that our young hero passes on his way through the void. I'm not particularly keen on this colour-job but that can be changed and it certainly gives people a better idea what it would be like to live and work within a haven of the void; an industrialised haven at that. I certainly like the more organic versions of the AirFish (maybe not pink) shown here with one wild and one captured. Although the one that's captured isn't wearing its riding harness.

And of course, what would be a journey through the void without our young hero. Shown here with his god given 'barrier' still in place, like everyone else who lives within the void.

How long will he keep it? Well, wouldn't be much of a story if he didn't have some sort calamity beset him.

Left Field

2009-02-22T11:12:00.004+11:00

Something completely unrelated to the previous posts. It's our sponsor child's birthday. Mooncar thought it would be nice to do a picture for him. So, this is what I did for the Soccer (Futbol) mad 8 year old.

It's a shame that we didn't read the notice on the back of the envelope properly and apparently we shouldn't send it with the B'day package. Oh well, we'll just slip it in or send it separately to the Angel Gabriel.

Have any of you sent a picture of a hat wearing Platypus on a soccer ball to an Arch Angel who is also considered by some orders as the Angel of Death? No, I don't think so! Although I guess an animal with a ducks bill, a tail like a beaver, fur like a cat, and lays eggs like a chicken proves that this kids god has a pretty good sense of humor. At the very least.
___________________

UPDATE: Ha! I love the fact people are coming from Ruela's site (featuring a dark and disturbing animation over my Black Page test) to find a cute and cuddly Platypus. :D Now that's good value! You should go over and have a look at the animation. Awesome work Ruela!

Encapsulate - Air Fish Trial

2009-02-18T20:58:00.008+11:00

Okay, after the last picture being universally welcomed (which I appreciate greatly BTW), Shel over at Halfland wanted me to animate it...

This is the best I can do in 24 hours (yeah, OK, it took maybe 4hrs). I also have a story now. I don't think it's too bad. I'm calling it Encapsulate as a working title. Oh, and that strange soundtrack is actually a beautiful Brass counter bell I bought from an artist in Melbourne overlapped with a couple of notes 'stolen' from Ticharu with atmosphere supplied by Possum (our Budgie) slowed down to 65% of his normal speed. Cool, huh!

PS. I started school again today. They've bought a 'pre-loved' 35mm film animation machine and are offering it as an elective. So good to be back.

Dilettantism

2009-02-17T08:52:00.013+11:00

So last night I was thinking about the early Get Films animated logo I did, the one with the flower that grows out of a seed of dust made from the remnants of an older destroyed flower (not online any more it would seem...). This thinking meandered past a grove of head-fruit that grew in shapes akin to life being often enclosed within it's own limits without avenue for growth outside of itself. This briefly lead down a path towards large ornate terrariums but, while watching a show about a bipolar Stephen Fry, quickly flew off towards a cloud of ephemeral perceptions on how vast tracks of the human race are encapsulating themselves in chemically induced boundaries... or financial boundaries... or emotional... or physical... or whatever...

So, this is the idea doodle. The rough idea doodle. I didzit lay'n down on tha couch with nuth'n har' back'nit. I couldza gotz a book but et wooda meant gitt'n arp.

Now, of course, I really like this. Particularly the strange flying airfish character in the bottom right corner with his singular bell like voice that rings out through the void. But the problem with that is I don't know these characters, their environments or what their story could possibly be. To find out I'd have to do, what I see so many other artists do and admire greatly, is to spend a large amount of time in that world, drawing it, figuring out where the staircases go, how the people (if they are people) go about their daily business of interacting with seemingly giant creatures and flowers and each other and their boundaries. I could greatly enjoy living for a time in that world.

But what about the other worlds... I think this is why I like film. I can flibbertigibbet from one world to another.

One for the romantics

2009-02-14T13:29:00.003+11:00

A single serve for two of homemade triple-choc macadamia nut brownie with pink Belgian chocolate heart and a rich glass of Cabernet Sauvignon from a friends family cellar door.

A perfect end to a perfect meal... enjoy your Valentine!

Attitude

2009-02-10T16:05:00.003+11:00

Here are two different offerings from yesterdays daily sketch book.

One was done during a break at work, the other was to capture a story idea I had while relaxing at home on the sofa. I defy you to pick which was done at which time...

Yeah, OK, probably not a hard task.

Featured short film #1

2009-02-08T09:57:00.002+11:00

Before the earth turns to melted goo, the thermometers change profession, and I retreat to my underground lair near the centre of the world where it's cool... compared to here. I will let you watch this little film.

This film was made by a set designer, what it lacks in animated magnificence (only due to time constraints and the lack of animators on the crew) it certainly makes up for in rich colours and beautiful sets. The story is a bit of a gem too.

And if you watch the credits, which I haven't, you may see a familiar looking name.

Heat Wave

2009-02-05T09:41:00.002+11:00

It's HOT!

It has been for weeks.

The southern states of Australia have been hitting 40°C (+100°F) every day. Of course, this is Australia and we're used to hot weather. We only really know it's Hot when the local wildlife start abandoning their homes in the bush in favour of our abodes. Like this cute little character from down South Australia way who decided to wander inside for a drink. First he tested the temperature of the water... with his tongue. Not many people know that Koalas have the second most temperature accurate tongue in the animal Kingdom. The first being the Himalayan Camel but who wants to trek half-way up an ice covered mountain only to be told, guess what, it's freak'n cold.

Then, seeing as it was cool enough for his liking, he rightfully claimed it as his own personal swimming pool.

Mmmm... Cool! Now, how about that drink?

Well, he is an Aussie after all. What did you expect him to drink?

Yeah, I know, that's not right.

They forgot to give him a meat pie and tomato sauce.

Blow!

2009-02-04T11:37:00.003+11:00

I've been on sets where some of the most incredibly talented helpful crew and cast that morning don't seem to bring the same attitude to their work later in the day...

I'm not sure why...

Yeah, Ok, I do know why but it's nothing to get overly excited about. Take a deep breath. It'll be different in the morning.

Practice makes...

2009-01-30T09:38:00.004+11:00

...whatever you want.

So yesterday, as I lounged at home on my mid-week day off (I know I'm spoilt), I was removing the excruciatingly frustrating malware from Mooncar's computer (fracking retail sites!) I was doodling away on a piece of paper as I'm want to do.

Now, most people say they can't draw but be assured it's a practiced skill. I'm not very precise when drawing doodles but I'm still practicing the hand-eye co-ordination it takes to manipulate a pencil which enables me a certain amount of skill to execute more detailed and professional looking renderings when needed. Like with the children's book.

I was also reading a book about brain plasticity while waiting for the scans on the computer to run (may anyone who creates a single piece of Malware suffer with Tinnitus) and how imagining the use of a skill is almost as effective as actually practicing the skill. In one study people imagining an exercise increased muscle size by 22%, the people actually doing the excercise increased their size by 30%. There are complicated explanantions as to how the brain effects this change in the body which are still not fully understood by the people doing the studies.

So maybe if those people who say they can't draw (and want too) just imagine themselves drawing for a few weeks, how the lines form, how they would shade in a shape, etc. Then when they actually start drawing they will find themselves already in a position of increased skill. There is a name for that... Meditation.

I find that interesting.

Well, when meditating on my doodles I did 'it' again. Came up with another idea. Whoops. But hey, I wouldn't mind learning Flash. I think a Flash site with an entire body made up of drawings like this with stories and video associated with each body part would be a really fun way to navigate through an artists body of work. So. Lets add another project to the list to be done somewhere in the future.

All the Kings horses

2009-01-19T17:00:00.000+11:00

wait... sideline before I get started, I just thought about that poem. Why would the kings horses be trying to put an egg back together. No wonder they didn't have any luck. Who ever heard of a cloven footed animal successfully undertaking fine-detailed restoration work?

Errr; Now; What was I going to post about? I'm sure it wasn't a lament about the pathetic funding in arts conservation courses at equine universities, and I don't think it was about osteoporotic eggs with little balance or sense to stay away from high places...

In that case it was probably about projects that seem impossible. For the first time ever I actually sat down and wrote out all the uncompleted projects, whatever their stage of conception, that I would genuinely like to complete one day.

I have;

1 Film Course (at least)
2 Web serials
5 Short Films
2 TV shows
8 Feature films
2 Features films which would have ongoing Mini-series
1 Childrens book (at least)
1 Novel
2 Music Videos
1 Scultpure
1 Family project that I promised to do.

That appears to be 26 projects I want to complete... and all I've done is some scribbling that doesn't relate to any of it.

I'm not sure I should be allowed any more ideas until I cross at least one of those off the list. Or... and this may just be the best plan... I should stop procrastinating by writing lists and get on with it.

Actually, this list is the first step in prioritising my projects. I really didn't realise I had that many... *whew* I'm in for quite a ride if I can get a quarter of it done this life.

Secret Squirrel Means Business

2009-01-13T12:24:00.001+11:00

Secret squirrel business

2008-12-29T22:43:00.010+11:00

Mooncar (the Monster) and I wrotes a book for my young Niece as a Xmas present... Okay, it's only seven pages long but Iz drews the piktures too. See!

It's a story about the friends a young girl meets on the way to show her mate Pete a frog she befriends.

The book is made with different textured papers; smooth Japanese printed paper cover with a silk with metal inclusions title label; inside cover is embossed pink; illustrations are done on cartridge that were individually glued back to back with the story pages which are made of a delicate soft paper impregnated with silk fibres. The silk pages are hand torn to size to give the pages a fluffy silk edge. Basically, the point being, if I was kid (not just mentally I mean) and came across a book made that way I wouldn't be able to help myself but to pick it up.

The illustrations are pencil drawings scanned and coloured digitally in my 'secret squirrel' 'had an fine arts major complimenting my abilities with water colours' style. The silk page illustrations are done using a similar technique and are colour meditations on the people involved in the story. They where my Niece, my Sister in-law, Myself, Mooncar, my Bro and the Frog of course... the last one being purely imagination. I don't really know any frogs that well.

The font has been done in colours which help elicit particular emotional responses at various parts of the story. The fonts are formatted on the page in a very particular 'secret squirrel' style which I hope to use in the future as a way of helping adults learn to read to their children with the intended intonations meant within the sentence. I don't think everyone needs that help but it's nice for children of those who do... and it's a great marketing idea... um... I think I could work on these ideas a little more. They do work really well within this book though.

And the whole package is beautifully bound in an ornamental Japanese style by a guy who is well known for his leather hand bound volumes and work with large American film productions such as the Matrix and Mission Impossible part deuce. This binding style was admittedly a little bit of research and development for his company... of course meaning that at one stage it didn't go exactly to plan. The covers warped due to the multiple paper layers absorbing glue at different rates. That made me *sigh* *kick* *grumble* *a lot* but as you can see everything turned out great in the end. *smile*

Anyway, that's the end of my tale of what's been keeping me so busy. I hope you all had a Merry Xmas and you're planning a blinding... um, safe and happy New year.

THE END

I am still here

2008-12-15T16:39:00.004+11:00

I've been doing secret squirrel projects that needed my part completed by 7:30am this morning.

My part is complete.

Now, on with normality! Wait, I only have a couple of days left at work before I'm taking a holiday. I had a lot of time off this year, but it was hardly relaxing. So now I'm ready for a good, hard, high intensity chillax. Nice!

I'll be around to your blargs before too long. In the mean time this;

Don't you just love drawing.

Movie Monster Magic - part 3

2008-11-25T15:40:00.003+11:00

You can see the first and second parts of this post somewhere here... or there... or, well, follow those links if you likes.

As for part 3, it's time to play with some fairly funky, if not carcinogenic chemicals. I've been told there are some not so carcinogenic chemicals that do the same thing but I haven't had time to see if there's a supplier down this way.

I'll keep you posted but until then, wear these;

Then take these;

In these amounts;

Of Part A

Of Part B

and pour together...

Whisk for 1 and 2 and 3 and 4 and 5 and 6 and 7 and...

...then pour into your mold and put on the top.

Obviously with only 8 seconds of time to work with you're going to want to be very prepared before you start mixing chemicals together and work fast but sensibly when you're pouring it into the mold.

I always have another person with me to pour part B into part A while I'm whisking. I also get them to put the top on the mould as I finish pouring, As they put the top on I'm reaching for the bricks. It's, like, you know, team work!

After about an hour (I usually leave it for 12 hours) the chemicals will have finish all their reacting and you can open the mold. The final product is bound to look a little messy.

But as you cut off the excess foam and patch some of the seams where the latex meet you will end up with something like this. Still rough, but obviously the same thing that you were trying to mould.

Next time, (meaning, if I get time tomorrow) I'll show you a more finalised puppet and even see if I can get the sucker to work and look half decent on camera.

Movie Monster Magic - part 2

2008-11-14T09:13:00.003+11:00

You can find part one of this post, with it's scary scary monster, down thar.

So we have the finished mold... what are we going to do with it? Well, this!

That's one part black acrylic paint (I use a high quality artist paint but it doesn't really matter), one part bronze acrylic paint (you need to check this can be mixed because some metallic paints go back to their base colour when they're mixed - the base of bronze is grey if ya don't know) and 8 parts liquid brushing latex. I've also used a red acrylic paint/latex for the inside of the monsters mouth and white acrylic/latex for the teeth and claws but that's all covered with black in this shot.

Also, not that you can see it but there's artists wire mesh around the eyeballs (large white beads held into the mold with pins) so the eye surrounds will be manoeuvrable. Of course that's all been covered with brushing latex paint mix. Which makes the brushing latex about 5mm think in some parts. Anyone whose worked with brushing latex will know that's going to take YEEEEEEAAAARRRRSSSSS to dry all the way through... if at all. So what to do? What to do?

That's right! Put this whole thing in an oven. I use a little counter top oven for my latex baking which limits the size of any mould, hence creature, I can make. But that's unimportant, if you really want to make a big creature (with a lot more than two parts to the mold) just use a commercial oven. You'll find one for sure. More importantly though, for a latex cast of about 1cm thick you put the mold in the oven for roughly 3 hours at 60 degrees Celcius... that's like... 10800000 milliseconds at 140 Fahrenheit for the American crowd.

OK, now you've waited 14 and a half nanobots for your latex to dry, you're going to need these things... and if you're interested I'll even get around to telling you what they are!

First of all you want some prosthetic adhesive. I use Pros-Aid... because it's the only one I know. This stuff is used for sticking latex and silicon FX make-up to human skin.

But don't do that... because you need the release agent to make it let go. No-one wants to see you wandering around emergency with a ginormous nose attached to your... who am I kidding, GO FOR IT! It's also very good at sticking bits of latex to things... so I give the latex skin a thin coat to make sure it sticks to the foam (I know, what foam? You'll see).

You may also notice I'm wearing gloves in the picture above. It's not necessary for Pros-Aid but is for the foam. Just be careful you don't stick your latex glove to the latex skin of your monster when you're putting in the armature. This armature basically consists of two arms which are attached to bicycle brake levers (so they can be mechanically moved later) which feed down the puppet and through the legs and out a couple of metres to where the control box will sit.

There is also a spine that feeds into the nose of the puppet so the little fella can be posed properly. I also put a couple of extra pieces of armature wire in the legs to give them some extra rigidity.

And, I think that's about all I can stomach for part two... part 3 will follow shortly and will be all about putting foam inside the puppet and giving him the finishing touches.

Movie Monster Magic - part 1

2008-11-12T15:39:00.004+11:00

If you want to know in more detail about making something like this, there's a post about it here.

Gun Play

2008-11-06T08:34:00.010+11:00

Film-makers arrested in fake gun drama

07:32 AEST Thu Nov 6 2008

Four Melbourne [...pronounced 'Mehlbin' for the Americans...] filmmakers have been charged on summons after a passer-by mistook their theatrical gunplay for a real-life drama.

Police were called to a block of flats in inner suburban Carlton about 10.40pm (AEDT) on Wednesday, when a member of the public reported seeing a person threatening another with a firearm.

"A person came into Carlton police station pretty distressed, saying they had seen a guy with a gun. All they said was that they saw the gun being held to someone's head," a police spokesman said.

Police and a critical incident response team sealed off the area and arrested the four people at the scene.

Film equipment and an imitation firearm were allegedly found.

"It looks like they were making a film and they were the only ones that knew about it," the spokesman said.

The four men in their 20s face charges of possessing a firearm - which includes imitation weapons - and causing a public nuisance.

Senior Sergeant Stephen Cooper said the filmmakers' actions were extremely dangerous.

"They hadn't notified any persons what they were doing down here today, there were no permits, they hadn't had the courtesy to notify even the security within the premises here," Snr Sgt Cooper told the Nine Network from the scene Wednesday night.
________

See, about 8 years ago our government offered filming subsidies in the form of tax breaks to the
large American film studios. We now have Warner Brothers and Fox Studios based in Australia. They make wonderful films (some of the time) and predominantly use Australian crews. It created a climate where the people at the top of their careers could work on high budget films, and the people who are up and coming in the industry could work on the lower budget Australian productions.

It was great. Until, of course, the local governments raised their council filming rates to gouge the US productions of their cash. This had two effects. The Americans could film elsewhere in the world for less money and the Australian filmmakers could no longer afford to pay the council rates for their low budget independent films.

The fact here is not that these filmmakers did the wrong thing, it's that filmmakers everywhere in the world will try to produce their art in any way possible despite harsh economic conditions. The Americans don't really make films here much any more. As someone who has 'shut down' numerous Sydney streets to film (without Council or Police approval) I believe it's about time the Councils in Sydney, Melbourne and Brisbane take the gun away from filmmakers heads and lower their rates and remove the red tape for local producers once again. It is too hard for small producers, such as myself, to get the permissions we need. At a price we can afford.

The last thing the industry needs is to go back to the dark ages of the 1970s and 80s when we were only making 5 or 6 serious films a year.

PS. I'm not what most people would call a liberal, but well done to those Americans who voted on making a much needed change to your countries political climate.

Super cool glassblowing competition

2008-10-31T09:23:00.003+11:00

Go and visit Scott.

Go now!

You don't have much time left.

If you leave a comment on his blog you can win some beautiful pieces of Glass Art.

Why are you still here?

Goarn Get!

Why I love filmmakers

2008-10-20T15:37:00.005+11:00

A while back I did some volunteer work for the Director of a stop-motion animation. Heh? Did I just call it work. Hardly. When you have the ability to help out another filmmaker with your skills (or as my friend calls them 'SKILLZ MAN, YOU GOT DA SKILLZ') in a way that it doesn't impact on your own meanderings, I always suggest that you do it. And don't do it half-assed because you're 'only helping'. Do it to the level you would want it done on your own project.

Why? Well, there's something very satisfying in helping someone achieve a little part of their dream. No, not the dream to become a successful filmmaker, that's no real dream at all. But the dream of seeing their story and characters take on a living breathing life in front of their audience to the point where someone in the room forgets they're watching a movie and actually begins to care what happens to their friends, or hated enemies, or a small Pixar animated Robot up on screen. Now who wouldn't want to help someone create a moment like that? Oh and you also get mysterious boxes in the post for your troubles. *smiles* And who could live without a mysterious box or two.

BOX INCLUDED: Props not used on the film, the most beautiful surface gauge
you ever did see (machined by the Directors dad!), the animation
book I loaned them, and a book about amazing people and their stories.

*Sigh* I love filmmakers. In the words of Bill and Ted... Be excellent to each other!

In other news, I've been working on more wonderfully messy things all in the name of creating another story in which we can lose ourselves for a little while.

FUN!

From the darkness creep

2008-10-14T12:37:00.002+11:00

the Portal Mistress

visceral breath corrupting air

Seekers who enter, Beware!

...

a shame her haircut looks so cheap?

-=Click=-

Character design on the other hand is always fun... I quite like the girls face paint. I imagine it in thick 'white grease paint' with the 'blood and bruises befouling into septic green putrescence' gobbed on in rough overlaying patches. Tasty!

Of course, the moment you do this sort of make-up your actor generally gets stuck in make-up for a couple of hours every shoot. It's not uncommon but on small shoots like mine who wants to spring for a make-up professional every time a camera is turned on? So what other options are there? I don't know...

Anyone have thoughts?

Hmmmm.... anyone ever made a leather mask? Now that could be fun. Do that type of make up on a leather mask. Just when I didn't think she could be any more freaky. Nice!

Updating because I can...

2008-10-08T12:48:00.001+11:00

...or should...

...or something.

Gawd, I'm bored with the paperwork side of producing films.

I've decided to be a jeweller instead.

2008-09-25T13:01:00.009+10:00

So, I've taken a leaf out of my Grandfathers book, who was among other things a very talented jeweller, and decided to custom make some jewellery. I'll be using them as props for a film. Who would have thought you could wake up one day and just decide to do this and have it work... well... me, really!

Yeah, OK, I didn't have anything to do with making the nickel plated brass counter bell. That comes from a women Melbourne for surprisingly little investment. I did try to find pendants that would fit the bill of what I needed but when I couldn't find what I wanted I just made them from odds and bobs and bought bits. I'll explain.

The one of the right which is the one that will be used in the film uses a 16 mark negative lens from an 1950s Optometrist kit which although securely attached also comes completely free from the mirror beneath. The lens fits in perfect contour with the mirror which I cut to measure and edged with brass foil. I then took a large steel spoon for the back (below) and cut and hammered it to shape then punched with a, well, a metal punch to create the textured finish. This is all pinned together using the strip of brass down the back which used to be a brass wall hook that I hammered out flat and retro-fitted to the pendant. I've then used raw brass filigree cut and hammered into shape, and attached a necklace eye loop, as a decorative edge. The chain is a vintage brass chain that I bought.

The Pendant as a prop is to be used as a key to open and read a book of spells (which I also made; no photo's yet). So in keeping with the mood of the piece I tracked down a copy of the Arcana Mundi, which is a book about the occult that contains some very old rituals and spells from Greek and Roman times, in which I found an appropriate spell and on a bright sunny afternoon bound a spirit to the heart of the pendant... apparently... Oh, I followed the ritual perfectly but hey, who knows if these things work... I do wonder though if that might account for the seizures people have when the put the pendant on ;)

The second pendant on the left is my grandfathers broken watch mounted backwards, to show the watch gears, in more raw brass filligree. It's combined with a brass butterfly that was given to me, and faced with a 1920s monocle all pinned together with a brass document clasp that's been reshaped for the purpose. I still need to put a back on this pendant... Mooncar thinks some type of moulded black acrylic, which would look cool, but I'm thinking another metal back would look good too. The thing I like about this pendant is that although the watch movement is broken the Second hand still occasionally works and without warning the gears inside the pendant will suddenly spring into life for a few seconds. It's like a kinetic sculpture.

It's been a fun process which I've enjoyed a lot. Not a lot of Directors get to hand make props for their films so I may as well enjoy it while I can.

PS. A huge thank you to Shel over at Halfland for her beautiful gift of fabrics, and so forth, for Mooncar and I. Well, Mooncars are beautiful... mine are well, Monstery! Puppet Monstery! Cool! I can't wait for us to create something fun with them. THANKS MATE!

It's all so bright and shiny

2008-09-18T14:56:00.004+10:00

I don't think I've ever put these on here. This is the very bright and shiny front cover and label art for the DVD of Whirligig. It's a strange thing to revisit a film I made so many years ago. But it is nice to remember that putting a lot of effort into a good story pays off in the product.

Although, watching it again (really watching it not just having it play) after so many years makes me wonder what the film would have been like if I'd of had a half decent animator involved. I guess that just goes to show that a good story is a good story no matter how it's packaged.

Now I should stop revisiting the past and get on with another, new, good story... hmmm, do I have one?

Whirligig event

2008-09-16T12:08:00.007+10:00

If you're anywhere near the State Library of Victoria on Oct 7 you should drop in and help support that states Mental Health Week by attending the Mental Health Legal Centre fundraiser being held by Law Institute Victoria.

An added bonus of your philanthropy is that you'll get to see Whirligig on the big screen, which of course, is where you want to see it most of all.

...and after all, we could all use a little more mental health couldn't we! Even if it is only easing your middle class guilt by giving $20 to a more than worthy cause.

Owall Graffiti

2008-09-01T16:06:00.003+10:00

Parliament of Hearts

Oh, I'm around...

2008-08-29T12:39:00.003+10:00

...and doing very well. Only, every time I try and write something, this happens;

You DON'T want to know what happens when I use a keyboa...

I'm ALIVE!

2008-07-16T12:07:00.002+10:00

At least that's what they tell me between naps.

WARNING: If you click the picture you will see the actual headwound where they took the tumour.
Do NOT click the picture if you are easily grossed out... it's gruesome.

Actually, the surgery couldn't have gone any smoother. I'm tumour free and they didn't have to use any other parts of my body to fill the resulting gap, they used material from just above the surgery, so I'm already a lot healthier than we expected. The work they did do is healing really fast and with Dr Happys Chewable Morphine I'm at home and mellowing out nicely. Probably my biggest complaint at the moment is how little I can open my jaw because of the bruising... but that just means I have to cut my 'whatever my heart desires for dinner', I'm being spoilt :), into very small pieces... hey, it's not like I have anything more to do with my time.

I hope everyone is great out there and I'll answer emails, visit blogs, and so forth really soon.

Now, time for Dr Happys!

See you on the other side...

2008-07-09T23:15:00.003+10:00

Of the glass?

Heh heh heh!

Monkey Love

2008-07-08T09:20:00.004+10:00

Only a few of the people here would remember that I once made a movie with a Monkey. Well, 'THE Monkey' really. Well, 'THE Monkey' who is also some type of p u p p e t (Shhhhh, he doesn't know and he can't s p e l l, because he has a wonderful human who helps in such matters).

Of course, there's only one thing that people love more than a Monkey, or a p u p p e t Monkey for that matter... and that's Zombies. How can you resist. You can't. Watch, enjoy, I'll try and post again before tommorrows D-day.

Oh, and Ruela, the nova-conquistador from the Neo Artes blog, Tagged me with some Meme about some things you'd take on a road trip. Hmmmm, let's see, because of my forthcoming trip down an unchartered road;

CDs (or in my case playlists on an MP3 player)
1. Morphine - A Cure for Pain (Song: A Cure for Pain)
2. Tea Party - The edges of Twilight (Song: Fire in the Head)
3. Altiplano - Transatlantic Non-Stop (Song: Endim Bulag Bashina)
4. RHCP - Freaky Styley (Song: If you want me to Stay)
5. Jamiroquai - Return of the Space Cowboy (Song: Half the Man)

Talk about mellowsville... I guess I can leave my heavier playlist at home, it's not like I'll be rock'n out.

Essential Items
1. Mooncar (She's an item... right?)
2. Tooth Brush
3. Portable DVD player with at least one of my DVD folders (which is only 200 films)

Wardrobe
1. A six foot tall Marlboro cigarette.

PEACE OUT!

A post. A post, my kingdom for a post...

2008-07-02T13:21:00.004+10:00

...mind you, if you've seen the Kingdom of Richard and it's many swamps, North-West-Indian-like sanitation, and snide and inconsiderate population of 1 nude fat dude with a chip on his shoulder and a small tub of out of date sour cream his only protection, then you may want to keep your post in reserve for the off chance you may one day receive the same offer for a Kingdom which is a little more, well, Kingly.

As to the post though *shrugs* I haven't really been producing anything. So there's nothing really to post. I did film football this last week. Fun! The new camera girl worked out fairly well, with only a days notice (and about 5 hours behind a Pro Camera) she was thrown in the deep end and, although we needed more time to go through the shot-runs so her work was a little more dynamic, it was a good solid effort. I'll use her service again if I didn't scare her off the first time.

Hmmmm... what else, I shot some footage of Possum with the DSR because I wanted a fun film for a blog post like this guy... or this guy... or this alien... or this egg... or the other strange but delightful filmmakers out in blog-land. Those people and aliens and things are very good natural editor type peoples and I keep losing their links so now I have them. But, as usual, life has taken over and the footage sits on tape with no editing in sight.

I've also been blogged (somewhat) by one of my favourite online filmmakers as one of my old tripods has entered the wonderful world of HalfLand. I've also been receiving lots of visits from the Nani-Bird blog [start *Wave*] Hi Nani-birders! [/end *wave*] because the Nani-Dragons were blogged by the Nani-Bird creator Josh along with many other designs created by people joining in the Nani-Bird experience. I really should pull my finger out and finish off the small amount of work I have to do on the Nani-Dragon designs and send them off to Josh but, you know, 'life has taken over'. I should also be putting some ground work in on the Kath Bee song but the time I'd scheduled for that was subverted by a really cool Manga Festival that I just 'have' to see... and sleep, yes, there's been lots of sleep.

I've also been for all my hospitally type adventures before the big Op. Besides the tests and so forth the best adventure resulted in some really cool PJs, a wery nice welour wobe, and some new comfy warm chocolate coloured Uggs. I'm pretty much all set. I've even been, like, abstaining from bad stuff, like incomohol, so I can feel all healthy and ready for the long road to recovery... or something.

What else... nothing... I don't even have a picture... actually I do... here's a pic I did for a friend who absolutely Looooooooooves Hello Kitty.

I know, I'm such a prick! She loved it.

I'll be around to comment on your blogs the moment, you know, life stops getting in the way...

What's new in the world of film

2008-06-17T13:00:00.003+10:00

The simple answer... nothing... there is nothing new happening. Except for maybe the strange blurring of lines between New Media and what Television Stations are calling 'New Media' as a way of somehow branding their products as hip and funky for their ill educated Gen Y target audience. But lets not get into THAT discussion, it's boring and ruled by the fact that there doesn't seem to be adequate ways of eliciting revenue from true New Media products so we have to masquerade old media as something new. Happily there ARE new films in the world of film and I've just spent a goodly amount of time sitting in dark rooms watching what Australia and the World have to offer at the Sydney Film Festival.

One of the more interesting sessions was the Dendy Awards screenings. With the documentary Rare Chicken Rescue probably the stand out film. It had that uniquely Australian flavour that we love so much down here.

There was also a short film about a dead Maori boy whose white friend, although somehow responsible for his death, went to the lounge room based funeral to say his farewells. The film revolved around the stand-off between the Maori family and the white kid. As an allegory on the state of affairs between indigenous and western culture it was probably the film with the most compelling idea in the session as it tried to talk about how without forgiveness and the giving up of anger on the part of the indigenous culture their future would be one doomed to destruction. It's just a shame that this excellent idea suffered from some really poor Direction with everything from the on-set cues, to the shot choices, to the editing being a decided turn off to the intrinsic message. Film can be an unforgiving medium even when using the best ideas.

There was also a film whose cinematographer was a very close childhood friend of my families. I'd heard along the grape-vine that he was involved in the industry and it turns out that Adam is now one of Australia's most talented young cinematographers. Good on him. His visuals in the film at the awards saved what I felt was an otherwise ho-hum effort.

But that's enough from me on the world of film. Whenever I critique other peoples work I always end up feeling like a bit of a duck-head. Who am I, with my film offerings, to tell other filmmakers what they should and shouldn't create. It's not like any of my films have appeared at SFF.

Duck Head
Compiled from Duck featured in The Mill and random emo girl.

In other news:

DSR is back, finally! YAY!
I haven't touched anything to do with Dragons all week.
Possum is molting... no, not molten, molting.
I'm trying to hire a camera operator for football.
I'm trying to get an appointment with my surgeon to convince him to operate before the shut down the elective surgery for Catholic Youth Week.
And a thousand little things need to be done.

I hope everyone is having fun out there.

Animating with Fire and Ice

2008-06-10T16:08:00.004+10:00

I know, Crazy! But anything is possible with a pair of scissors, your imagination and a box of matches.

Oh Mandy by the Spinto Band and directed/edited/post prod by Jon Watts over at Colonel Blimp

Playing with Paper

2008-06-04T13:21:00.003+10:00

So, a long time ago now I found this cool website where they give you free designs to make all manner of paper birds. They're lots of fun to make and look at. They're what my Japanese friends would probably call 'kawaii'. Go, make, have fun!

So as I continued playing with the ideas of dragons I thought to myself that it'd be really cool if the dragons came directly from the imagination of the child and the best way to illustrate that would be to have the dragon come to life directly from a child's drawings, ie. you could have a Nani-bird-style dragon where the designs on the dragons are the chidlers pictures and then stop-mo animate the paper dragons running around the room destroying things.

So, last night while watching that His Dark Materials movie (which I really quite like, 'cause I understand it will never be a patch on the books, except for some of the voice direction) I had a go at creating my own little paper dragon. He needs some design changes to his snout and will have to be somewhat bigger to animate properly but I think he worked out really well and is quite cute. With some wire inserts it would be quite animatable in my opinion.

Now, if only I had children's pictures. I guess I could go all out and ask the local supermarket to co-sponsor a colouring competition with me, with the 'winners' being included in the video clip... Hmmm... is that direct advertising to the age group the song is intended for or what?! And we'd probably get at least 20 pictures back to make into Dragons. Hmmm... I'll have to talk to my financial officers (that's Me and Mooncar ;) BTW) and see what we can rustle up as prizes. I like the idea of that.

Of course, It'd mean I'd probably have to finish this project *cough* Easter film still needs some editing *cough*.

So, what do people out there in the big wide world think?

--------------------
UPDATE: Paper dragon Mk II - The snout is heaps better now but he still needs a couple of changes.

BURN!

My first!

2008-06-02T17:49:00.005+10:00

Hey, Look-y what I found. This was the first time DSR and I shot something together.

It was so much fun and took about 2 days of construction and 10 hours of shooting. I remember making this absolutely super cool sci-fi-type trapezoidal shaped set with removable walls and a mock-concrete looking floor for this little guy to sit in... why isn't it there? Because I finished it really late one summer night and let it sit over night and the hot glue of cardboard backed set met massive amounts of humidity and when I came to shoot the following morning the whole thing fell over and I shot with what I had rather putting it back together.

Anyway, I also updated the end to include my logo. It used to have... um... yeah, I don't remember. Enjoy!

Creativitinesisation

2008-05-28T16:32:00.007+10:00

As I wind down another shooting week, working between 8:30am and 12:00am for 4 or 5 days straight, and the editing reaches that stage of...

Click;

Cut;

Scroll;

Cut;

Ripple Delete;

Repeat.

Creativity reaches an all time low, nay, a more appropriate synonym which imbues the idea of uncaring tiredness that I can't think of because I don't care and I'm tired. It's nice to come out into the webisphere and find really cool inspiring stuff like this. Well, it's inspiring to someone like me who really enjoys creating stuff for people with my child-like mentality, namely children. Kath Bee's blog is linked over in my sidebar at the bottom.

So what do people think... on the weeks we're not Cut; Delete; Repeat; should we do some sort of film clip for one of KBs songs? You know, fer the fun've it!

I would have come up with some sort of drawn concept but you know... I don't care and I'm tired... YEAH, right, that's not me at all

fun with Dragons and a mechanical pencil

PS. No news on the camera yet... *sigh*

UPDATE: DSR needs, wait forrit, new heads and blocking unit... ka-ching! *sigh*

It should be remembered...

2008-05-22T16:53:00.008+10:00

...that one doesn't always need a camera to make films.

I haven't actually watched Whirligig for a couple of years now. I see it in a very different light than I did when I first made it. Although it's a shame it's not at higher resolution for you viewers... I know, shhhh... who ever heard of a filmmaker wanting their audience to see their film in the best possible way. Deep down I secretly love the design I did on this film and I'd love everyone who sees it to see it as I designed it. It's designed for the big screen. To me it was so lovely on the big screen... my opinion only. Typical Director! :)

Anyway, I can say I'm a lot more forgiving of the film now. When I first released it I was all too critical of every frame I felt had something out of place or was animated badly. It's nice to be able to look at it with a more relaxed mind set.

I'm also fairly shocked at how bare the sound track is... I guess that's what happens when you're not using music and don't have a professional sound mixer. I quite like it :) I also like the fact I have this back up in the big wide world webernet. I should fix more of my broken film links.

Anyway, who needs a camera!

eeep, me!

A tale of woe

2008-05-20T08:12:00.004+10:00

Here, first click this* to add some type of atmospherics to the story.

DSR sat in the simple comfortable lounge room, the earth tones of the couch and coffee table played easefully against the craze of coloured book spines that rose above him on the deep wooden shelves around three of the walls. The fourth wall, glass, allowed warm sunbeams to pick at the dust motes in shafts giving the room the enduring sense it must be the last warm day of Autumn. But the room gave no comfort to DSR. DSR knew something was wrong. He knew it deep inside. Where the dark unseen things slither to-and-fro. Where past shows of light can be left stored, unstirred in the gloaming and sometimes even forgotten about.

DSR hadn't forgotten about the light yet but he'd also known something was wrong for some time. It just wasn't the type of thing he could tell people about. Something so intrinsic to ones being often remains hidden, should remain hidden even to oneself. As internally unquestioned as the behaviour of the madman howling under the bright orb of the moon.

But DSR knew there'd been little changes in behaviour. He lived to work, that was his way, but of late his professional demeanour had slipped. Not only in that his usually graceful body seemed to have lost something of it's youthful glow but now, tattered at the edges, his once remarkable vision, celebrated as being able to see what others could not, to capture the essence of something well before his rivals had tuned into the action, carried disturbing jumps in reality. Each tic would cause the left most side of his vision to befuddle slightly and loose a small high pitched oscillating squeal causing a moments deafness before the sounds of the world jumped back into audible focus.

Of course, none of this could be seen during the course of DSR's work. No-one around him clued into the slightest difference from his usual impressive style. But despite his outwardly regular behaviour DSR also knew that all his work was reviewed; and as he sat there in his comfortable surrounds, somewhere close by, someone would be pouring through that days work and was bound to discover a raft of hidden anomalies.

Then the phone calls would start. Probably had already started. There would be a slight frustration in the voices of Professionals from both sides of the negotiations; but that would change, the tone would become increasingly serious when they realised that this was something quite out of the ordinary. Soon they would only be asking one question, what to do with DSR? Money was a factor in DSRs line of work. He knew it and so did they. They were unlikely to abandon him until they recognised his rehabilitation would cost more money than he could bring in. Then would come the dreaded 'upgrade'. Which was fine for them. They would adjust and continue. Find a new, maybe even better way. But DSR? He would be gone. There was certainly no retirement in this line of work. After everything he'd seen he would have to be disposed of, without ceremony, without regret.

So despite his internal decrepitude which called into question everything DSR had stood for, DSR sat, unthinkingly soaked in his last rays of lights, and waited for the phone to ring to tell him it was all over.

Possibly, the last placement of DSR**

I hate it when expensive equipment fails... my poor, poor DSR-PD150P. I really can't afford a new camera. It's going to cost me at least half of my contract earnings just to cover equipment rental. Grrr. I hope DSR can be fixed... and soon!

*Music by the ever awesome Ticharu otherwise known as Plum Flower Embroided-boy or something like that.

**Modified without permission from the Fraggles voice of wisdom; Marjory the Trash Heap.

Update on the Possum

2008-05-16T14:14:00.006+10:00

I've been editing a lot lately. Luckily I get to do it all from my lounge room. That means that as a file exports I get to hang with Mooncar and Possum.

We've been working with Possum to get him finger-tame and comfortable with being moved between perches. Well, last night we decided he'd made more than enough progress to try him outside the cage. Now, as with his forefathers, he's been in a cage all his life and didn't really like the idea of going anywhere near those big wide open spaces. So after 2 hours of trying to move him to the cage door and having him fly back to a 'safe' perch or even just leaving the cage open and waiting for him to emerge. I finally decided that I'd coerce him into the experience, ie. when he happily jumped onto my finger I just curled my hand around him and before he knew it he was out in the big wide world.

He blinked a couple of times and flew off on a mad dash around the house. Although we were of course a little scared for him, precision flying for a cage bird is not a strong suit at the best of times, he screamed around the corners of the lounge room, projectile pooping as he went, he softly bounced off a few walls, and then with all the grace of an elephant on ice skates 'landed' on the fig tree next to our couch. No worse for wear.

After happily jumping back onto our fingers and repeating the mad escapade (that's escapade not elephant ice-capade), which included one brilliant antic of trying to land on a bookshelf, somewhat missing and disappearing down the back only to emerge at the bottom with a look on his face of 'meant to do that', He calmed down and started just hanging out with us. Well, mainly the fig tree but also us. As can be evidenced by this shot of him posing on Mooncars shoulder.

He's always much better on the first night he tries something so we expect there will be a lot more fuss and pooping tonight when we try and put him back in the cage but, hey, at least he's out and about now.

I dont normally do these types of posts

2008-05-13T17:05:00.002+10:00

because it's not my work but everyone in the entire world really should see this brilliant piece of animation.

MUTO a wall-painted animation by BLU from blu on Vimeo.

Just crazy! This dude 'BLU' deserves some type of award, wait, I'm sure he'll get it.

Anyway, Hope everyone is cool. Chat to you soon.

Remember you're an artist!

2008-05-08T14:42:00.004+10:00

I didn't really have a post. I've been busy, busy, busy. I get about one day off a fortnight at the moment. Which should change starting this week. I need to remember that resting is good. I was going to do an easy post and grab another one of the mysteriously acquired photo's off the camera. But then I realised the camera is FULL of really cool photo's that I took. So even though I'm playing with videography most days, and spending too much time in front of the edit suite or burning sack loads of DVD's; I should remember that I DO have a couple of 'artistic' bones in my ol' body. So, here's how you sculpt a miniature head and cast it for use in a film from scratch... ... ... yeah, OK, the short version.

Oh yeah, that last photo... another one of the mysteriously acquired photo's.

CHIRRUP!

2008-05-01T09:23:00.006+10:00

We have a new friend
We liked him so much we bought him a new three storey mansion
It's only a small three storey mansion

So small in fact
it can only fit one small Possum.
But not any ordinary possum

It's POSSUM the Budgie

It's POSSUM the chattiest Budgie on the Block (I don't shut up!)

It's POSSUM the acrobatic 'hang upside down from the swing' and chat to you Budgie

Possum says, "Hey Everyone! I like this new mansion of mine
but I'll like it more when I'm finger tame and can fly outside my mansion.
And then hopefully I'll learn to say my name in English.

Because at the moment I call myself,
'CHIRRUP, Chi'ip, Tsup, Chirrup, Tsup, Chi Chu, Chirrup, Tsup, Soooowoowwoo Chirrup'
and that's just way to long a name to say at parties.

And now for this random picture I didn't take on my camera... "Duck Drinking Fish Soup?"

Videos; Remember Those?

2008-04-23T10:03:00.009+10:00

There is a project being undertaken in my house at the moment. A monumental task of epic proportions that will reverberate in history along with the Gaia creating the Grand Canyon, the Egyptians building the Pyramids, and the porn industry popularising the Internet.

That's right, I'm exaggerating! But it certainly feels that way as we're transferring our vast and varied video collection over to digital. Actually when I'm not at my nine to fiver or doing one of my contracts (the Football people were very happy with their new DVD producer *high five*), I'm not doing very much except watching all our old videos; we have some real gems. Last night I got to watch Big Trouble in Little China;

As if this isn't one of the coolest 80's movies evah; Right up there with it's 1986 counterpart, The Golden Child!

Although they don't really go together as a viewing pair I then followed that with one of the most inspiring films for filmmakers; Baraka. Not seen it? I bet you have. At least parts of it. Still, No? Sheeeeesh! Go! Now! Find! Discover! Oh wait... typically, it's on You-Tube. I don't agree with the way the You-tuber has broken up the film. There's some really distinctive chapters in the film that the digitiser has completely ignored. Those start and end points are really off-putting. Anyway, this is one of my favourite parts in the film. Go and get your relaxing beverage of choice (I'll have a coffee methinks) and sit back and enjoy about ten minutes of Baraka.

Shut up! I know this is a post for the sake of posting... or it has something to do with Earth Day... Yeah, let's pretend it has to do with earth day... don't judge me!

Back to Reality

2008-04-15T11:35:00.008+10:00

Of course, I would like to write. And of course, I would like to be making great films... or art... or something much like so many of you are doing out there.

But instead I've been taking video of young girls... errr... that sounds bad, before you call the cops you should know they parents paid me to do it... errr... wait, no really, there's no need to call the police! It's only football (that's soccer for the non-Europeans).

Australian Women's Football Team

It's always surprising in a small film industry like Australia's where the next job comes from. Now, yes, in the past I've filmed Weddings and the like but I hate that type of thing, it's not really filmmaking and I don't do videography unless it's for a really good friend. I don't need the experience, and although the money's quite good I certainly have that covered through other means. So when one of Mooncar's friends approached me to film football development videos for one of the clubs in the NSW Women's State Premier League my first reaction was, No way!

But then I started to think about it in terms of what it offered the players. I was an A Grade level footballer until my foot broke in two during an off season Comp. Occasionally when drunk I'll happily bore my friends with stories of past footballing glories. I also coached an Under 12s team and know what it's like trying to talk to juniors about aspects of the game (and their game... which is a completely different discussion) while still instilling the most important thing, the same genuine love of the game that I've always had. It also has to be said it's very difficult for young women to find a place in football. I coached one girl on my Under 12s team, the only girl in the competition in fact, and playing against the boys meant she had a lot of bench time until the second half when the bigger, faster boys had slowed down a little. Mind you, it was also because she was a great relief half back and could have an impact on the game just when you needed an offence slowed down to take the pressure off.

So, once a fortnight I rock up to the home games. Film three matches on the trot. Which is fine unless you need a bathroom break. I then edit and produce about 30-40 DVD's which I sell back to the clubs coaching staff, players and their parents (You forget how young sports people are at their peak, gosh, they're only children! I was never that young when I played A grade... surely! Okaaaay, I was a baby). Hopefully, as Coaches and Players review the DVD's, they'll come to a better understanding of their game and the higher level leagues, which in this case is only State and National (like the girls above) teams, will end up with better players for it.

A strange thought for me to be doing a job like that. It's even stranger to be doing videography and finding the process really satisfying.

Sometimes

2008-04-10T12:11:00.008+10:00

I feel like writing. I mean really writing. You know, the type of writing that contains marvelous inventions of language such as adjectives, such as marvelous. I want to audaciously discover new personal uses for adverbs in my writing until I become concupiscently lost in the meditation of which adverb would be the most appropriate to use for the simple act of one of my characters sitting up.

But writing isn't something you 'feel' like, it's not an interest, nor a hobby. A blog, for instance, is not writing. Don't get me wrong. Some blogs are beautiful designed and worded but in the end it's all finger painting. Colourful words splashed together to give the impression of writing.

No, unfortunately, writing's a protracted engagement with characters, stories, idea's and (hopefully) a lesson. As someone who has spent hours of my days, every day, month after month, scrawling different coloured inks into different shaped notebooks and still hasn't adequately described a characters existence during the period of their life that an audience (myself) would be interested in them, I really have to start wondering.

What on earth am I doing besides marking a variety of perfectly good notebooks? This isn't to say I can't write but merely that I haven't finished a real story. Short Films are easy... I know exactly what they look and sound like in my head and don't bother writing them until the day I have someone saying the lines.

And that's the cusp of it; I can imagine exactly what it has to look like and in putting it down on paper it, well, description is so open to interpretation isn't it? And that baulks me because... Well... Hmmmm...

a) I'm a control freak; (I'm yet to meet a Writer/Director who doesn't suffer this a little.)

b) My descriptive powers inadequately describe what I'm trying to discuss; (I often describe whole stories verbally but when asked if I've written it down I just shrug a no.)

c) Writing is an insular process that requires a lot of dedication and time. Maybe it's not conducive to the process when you live a busy life; work, play, (or my favourite combination of the two) running around from one project to another.

Maybe it's a combination of all three...

Whatever, it is doesn't change that I'm really in the mood to be writing. Shame I wasted half the desire on putting this post together whinging about it.

Now this weird thing... what is it? why is it on my camera? and who took the photo? OK, in reverse; Mooncar took the photo; she snapped it at Taronga Zoo when her dad was in town recently; having now looked at the Zoo's site, it's called a Binturong.

The Binturong (Arctictis binturong), also known as the Asian Bearcat, the Palawan Bearcat, or simply the Bearcat, is a species of the family Viverridae, which includes the civets and genets.

It is neither a bear nor a cat, and the real meaning of the original name is lost, as the local language that gave it is extinct. Its natural habitat is in trees of forest canopy in rainforest of Vietnam, Malaysia, Indonesia and Palawan Island.

It is nocturnal and sleeps on branches. It eats primarily fruit, but also has been known to eat eggs, shoots, leaves and small animals, such as rodents or birds. Deforestation has greatly reduced its numbers. When cornered, the Binturong can be vicious. The Binturong can make chuckling sounds when it seems to be happy and utter a high-pitched wail if annoyed. The Binturong can live over 20 years in captivity; one is recorded to have lived almost 26 years.

Kayaking down Dora

2008-04-07T11:00:00.003+10:00

This was our Kayak... maybe a little larger than most but we like it none the less. We enjoyed taking it on a dinner cruise every afternoon.

At our first stop we had to negotiate one of the proud local youth, Barry, he acted pretty tough.

But in a white wine and cream sauce mixed with mushrooms and baked pumpkin he was quite tender; particularly the bill which was fried in a Tempura batter.

Ahhh, pelicans! The other white meat. We couldn't eat just one. Poor Barry and his mates.

A very rare and strangely deformed Red Beaky Black Pelican named Ethel. Not good eating at all!

This was Stevo. An even more deformed Pelican... or maybe he was a deformed Penguin. Either way I don't want to know what they're dumping in this lake. Stevo guarded the middle of the lake. A valiant adversary. He tasted like chicken and was served in a sweet piquante pepper sauce with a fresh apricot side dish.

This was Doreen. All sorts of trouble this one. We certainly couldn't persuade her down from the tree. I think it was something to do with the smell of garlic butter sizzling in a nearby pan.

Luckily we fooled her into thinking she had won this house in a BoysTown lottery. Our chef, seen here wearing a tuft of grass as camouflage, quickly had her in the pan with the garlic sauce and lemon and served her on a bed of Jasmine rice. Not much meat on those legs but the crispy skin was delicious.

These were the luckiest locals of the day. James, Barb and Duncan. We were just too full for our Corella chocmint gelato; so we only ate their legs in Lime jello with mini-marshmallows.

And who said bush tucker had to be boring. I'm hungry now. I'm off to get some lunch.

Conspiracy

2008-04-01T23:22:00.009+11:00

We had the most marvellous weekend. Both relaxing and energising, sleepy and sporty; the perfect balance of pure luxury and down to earth small town fun. But there was something a little weird going on in that town.

We stayed in a little non-touristy town (as is our want) on a beautiful creek, whose name I wont mention here, and filled our days either swanning about in the luxury Bed and Breakfast; or...

fishing the creek with all manner of bird life. On one night we caught about 7 fish, threw back five and kept two for a BBQ by the creek;

or kayaking out on beautiful Lake Macquarie.

But I think in reality we had happened upon a town run by some sort of strange cult. It started with what we thought was some kind of joke, a strange fetish... that's right, some sort of donkey fetish cult!

The afternoon we arrived we noticed this 'logo' was stickered onto the outside of a painting in the reception of the B&B. Strange we thought...

But not as strange as the large donkey surrounded by swirling energies that adorned the window of largest shop in the small main street.

There were donkeys in all the windows of all the shops! This isn't a great photo... but after photographing this donkey in the window of a store the locals started paying close attention to us. This Donkeys speech bubble said something about 'community spirit'.

We thought it prudent to go back to our B&B...

Waiting for us in the shared lounge of the B&B was, you guessed it, a donkey. It was obviously a warning for us not to pry into the donkeys. Notice the strange 'orbs' that circle the donkey.

Over the next few days we tried to snap pictures of the donkeys that adorned every backyard that faced onto the creek. Unfortunately every time we tried to line up a shot the curtains would twitch or someone would walk out onto their back porch. It was almost as if they were expecting us. Needless to say we didn't get a lot of shots. It didn't make any sense to us but with this strangely unspoken threat hanging in the air we knew to start pretending to ignore the ever present donkeys.

The last photo taken here was followed by someone walking out of their back door and, with an aggressive stance, proudly but silently making a sign that can only be described as Donkey Ears. Holding the forearms directly up to the ears and waving the hands in our direction as if to mimic donkey ears... we fled.

On our last day there, not wanting to be in the town, we borrowed some bicycles from the B&B and went for a tour of the local district. And despite the occasional Kookaburra laughing at us it was very pleasant.

But as we came back into town, we were cut off by a large white van. Behind the tinted windows was a man that can only be described as having a piggish white face hidden under a mop of curly brown hair. He quickly rattled off an address followed by that same Donkey Ears gesture. My curiosity peaked, I managed to convince Mooncar to come with me to that address and after having a little trouble finding it we cycled in through the front gate of a large tree lined housing compound. The piggish gentleman walked nervously across the gravelled walkway towards us, and that's when we heard the low hum of an engine...

The strange thing is... there have been no reports of missing aircraft at all.

Needless to say, after the crash that barely missed us as I took the photo and resulted in the demise of this poor fellow, we got back on our bikes and went straight to the train station without collecting our belongings from the B&B. As we rode the first train out of town we considered ourselves very lucky to be alive and resolved never to go back into the Donkey country of the central coast ever again.

It was a fun weekend though, certainly not boring.

Excuses

2008-03-27T12:43:00.017+11:00

Relax! Do I need an excuse for not finishing the film yet? It is, after all, a film I designed to help iron out some of the digital effects and puppet making skills I want to use for the Sprites. That has been done. So although none of you have seen it, it’s an excellent film if only for this reason.

Strangely though, as I look around at similarly genre media being produced at the moment I do keep seeing hints of the Sprites. Which of course probably means my time is running out to produce them... that or I should be approaching these people to work on the Sprites. This often happens to people in this industry. You have an idea, work hard at figuring out what the best slant for that idea is, how it should be birthed into the world and then you discover someone already has a similar idea just being put into production.

Not the same picture but still LSD induced art?

I know Mooncar has often claimed people have stolen my ideas in one way or another. That’s not true. But it is almost as if artists are all looking at the same Akashic records and the first one to interpret what we’re instinctively feeling/seeing correctly, truly believe in it as an idea and be in a position to run with it will get the production up first. Hmmm, imagine if that was even remotely true, it does of course beg the question of what’s so important about the world seeing a strangely rendered but beautiful puppet show for kiddies at this point in time? Ha, I’m not nearly fatalistic enough to pretend I can answer that.

__________________

Of course, that does not in any way explain why big studios release uncannily similar pictures at the same time. That’s purely thieving an idea already in production and claiming ‘marketing strategy’ as an excuse. That’s why one of the films will always have poor production values, a ‘rushed’ look, with a story although similar that is truly pitiful. That’s the one that’s the marketing driven box office slop.

__________________

So, what’s my excuse for not finishing the film? Hmmm, let me see…

Evil Richard (whose removal has been postponed again
BTW, grrr) told me its completion would disrupt
universal harmony, I couldn’t do it to you all…

I was on a research trip to the former Soviet Union.
Now I know they celebrate Easter I can finish the film…

I accidentally fell into a small cardboard box,
liked it a lot and thought I’d stay a while…

I’ve been involved in developing a vaccine for an
upcoming bird flu pandemic to be unleashed by the CIA…

The UN international tribunal put me under house arrest
for committing a crime against humanity… luckily once I
had explained it, they agreed it was a necessary crime…

I had to stop and change a Nun’s tire. She was a naughty nun.
We fell in love. We ran away to Patagonia. A week later I realised
it was purely infatuation. Strangely, my car was still on the side
of the highway completely intact... I thought god would have been angrier...

I’m actually a Superhero, that last villain Kronos managed to
freeze me in a time fissure. But I think we’re all agreed, I showed him!..

I needed to brush my teeth, with a rare deep-sea crustacean…

A turf war broke out between local hoods that shut down our
entire neighbourhood. I mean really, it was an argument
that was actually over local turf. None of us dared leave
our houses in case we stepped on a piece of grass...

I just couldn’t find my characters motivation despite
having tried amphetamines, marijuana, LSD, and
psychedelic mushrooms; wouldn’t you know it, I’d
accidentally left it in my other pair of pants…

Well, surely it has to be one of those. In possibly related news, I’m going here this weekend.

So I should be nice and relaxed when I’m able to access my editing suite again next Monday, it's been off limits this week due to other work being conducted on it.

It's the Easter film!

2008-03-20T13:26:00.003+11:00

I'm such a Liar...

Fun though, ain't it! Even with my Germanic roots I've never really understood it though, that and Maypole Dancing. Let's dance around a pole holding ribbons. The first people to do that must have picked the wrong mushrooms in the forest that week... and had some spare ribbons laying around.

Although I do have to say that in the early 80's our national broadcaster had a programme filler (something they seemed to play every time there was a break in the predominantly British supplied programming) set in the verdent outdoors with a group of young people in white dress dancing around a Maypole to the tune of some Irish Folk tune that I can play on the flute but can't remember the name of... Come to think of it the dancers may have been all girls actually, which would make it quite pervy really. But that may be wrong, I don't remember for sure, it was before I noticed these things. What is the name of that tune... it goes like...

dah doooooooooo
dah doo dah doo
dah daah daaaam
dum, dum, dah dah,
dah-dah, dah-dah, daaaam...

wait, right, you can't hear that... damn, the video isn't on the greater world wide web either, doh, I guess I'll have to play in on my flute sometime for you.

Anyway, I used to love that little programme. The ABC should play that type of thing these days, hmmmm, it'd be kind of fun to do a recreation of that piece next time they have a significant anniversary. I can just imagine pitching that... the song goes something like... dah doooooo, and that's where they'd cut me off.

This is why people shouldn't live in the past - look at those haircuts.

That's enough random dribbling from me. Hopefully I should have the film up by Sunday. There's still a lot to do on it and I have a lot of other things going on that are distracting from it. But it should be done by Sunday (my time). Hopefully.

Shooting... myself.

2008-03-17T09:36:00.006+11:00

What a weekend! I was shooting this years Easter movie over the weekend and... actually, I should say I was 'trying' to shoot this years Easter movie over the weekend and had all sorts of problems.

Bunny in a chroma-key setup. I didn't like the results of this lighting test
so he ended up being shot on a black background for a luma-key instead.

I've never had a film shoot like that before. All my shoots have been fast paced well organised finish early thanks for coming affairs.

But not this one. We had all sorts of delays. Sets took longer to put together than we expected, there were props (like a calendar) that required files to be downloaded and printed off that wouldn't download let alone print off, one of my new lights containing a bulb I had specifically rung the company about before purchase to ensure it wouldn't overheat the light housing decided to overheat and completely melt the light housing almost causing a fire, the Fluoro strip light (seen above) I was using as a fill instead of the melted lights decided to jump out across the room and land directly under my bare foot as I walked past so that it shattered into a million glass shards (yeah, OK it didn't jump out. I was just stupid enough to step on a light) rendering my foot very sore and making it impossible to shoot the puppets because we didn't have enough light without a replacement fluoro tube.

This was how I felt after a few hours - Burnt out! Although it's hard to see in this photo the
bulb is actually drooping downwards because the glass got so hot it melted slightly.

There was more than that as well, like Brun's head flying off two seconds before wanting to shoot with him, but those were the insurmountable problems that when added up meant that the shoot had to wrap without finishing the required shots.

I did, diligently with one other person, stick it out until 2 in the morning shooting backgrounds... Now, I'm all tired and want a sleep. Well, I have replacement fluro tubes now so the shoot will recommence this evening. Barring further disaster we'll knock it over tonight. Oh, and the company I bought my lights from had better replace my melted light for free or... well, we'll see.

What did you do with your weekend?

UPDATE: The lighting company will replace my melted light and reimburse me the cost of the bulbs I cannot use because they're too hot for the light housing. Now I can look at it as just an unfortunate inconvenience rather than an expensive stupid mistake and an inevitable no holds barred fight to the death. I just love it when people/companies do the right thing by their customers, don't you? Good for them!

Go and Play

2008-03-10T10:12:00.010+11:00

It's Monday morning. Bleech. Oh well, at least I don't have to work long today. I'm off to meet some award winning Aussie doco maker for a documentary master class in a couple of hours. Last week I got to meet Ray Argall, who is one of Australia's most elegantly simple cinematographers, which was a bit of a thrill cause I've always admired his work. Still, bed feels like the better alternative today. Who am I? Garfield? Mondays *sigh*

Oh well, to help break up the funk, go and play over at Gnat's place. He's running an awesome contest to win some of his beautiful hand crafted glassware. Be sure to mention that I sent you because if you win I will also get another marble. I already have one of his large glass marbles from a previous contest. It sits on my shelf at home and people often can't help picking it up and commenting on it. It's tactile like that.

Funny story about that Marble actually. It features in the most bizarre way in the THIS is Alan Chapman documentary. At the start there is a play off between Alan's love of Astronomy, he even has a star in Taurus named after him, and the fact that Alan comes from a family of stars. I have a shot in the Doco of a star exploding because Alan says about His star that, "If it ever explodes you'll hear on the news that the star Alan Scott Chapman just went Supernova"... queue star exploding and title slide! It's a bit of fun and that IS the kind of thing Alan says. He's an interesting lad. Anyway, the explosion is actually a digitally manipulated photo of Gnat's marble. Wait, let me go look for a copy of it... Oooo, through the magic of editing here is one I didn't prepare earlier...

This is also the queue for the wonderful title slide music of our good friend Tich.
Talk about impressive on the BIG screen. Yeah!

Anyway, as I was saying the exploding material coming out of this star (which is actually a background NASA let me use and an eclipsed Moon I shot from my frontyard last August) is actually Gnat's marble... which is posted here. Of course, I ran a couple of digital passes over it to remove all the non-whites while still allowing the metallic elements in the marble to act as noise, then added motion blurs and animated it in AfterFX until it actually looked like an explosion. When creating special FX you really have to think outside the box, no choice.

But hey, it's still Gnat's marble under all that movie magic manipulation. And if you'd like one yourself go to Gnat's and win it.

Toys

2008-03-03T09:55:00.005+11:00

I am a bad capitalist. I don't buy a lot of clothes... I don't have a car... I don't even have a flashy mobile phone that can download a pizza directly to a harbour side condo to be spilled down a designer shirt onto suede Italian designer lounge. None of those things have a whole lot of interest for me. Except for maybe the Pizza, Mmmm pizza! Anyway, I grew up inside a national park surrounded by endless bush, not having a backyard full of poisoness snakes and a house full of more poisoness spiders is as much luxury as I really need. So as you can imagine I don't have a lot of 'toys'... well... except when it comes to film-making. Then I have some of the best toys imaginable.

Luckily I don't need to buy those types of toys every week, they're rather expensive. One of the problems I'm trying to solve for the Sprites production (still haven't come up with another name for them yet - Scamps seems to fit their song better than the other names) by doing the Easter film is my continuing poor results on digital compositing. I have these wonderful chroma-key drapes I got for my birthday (THAT's my type of toy!) but still haven't had wonderful results using them. Which is all very annoying. The main problem seems to be lighting, I can't get it even enough over the drapes.

So I rectified my bad-capitalist status on Friday and bought a kit of three daylight temperature lights for my studio.

Aren't they beautiful! Well, they are to me. Now, the reason I've been putting off buying lights like this is that they are not cheap. $2-3K not cheap. Except for this kit. These are not superdooper film lights, so they only cost a few hundred (which is a marvel to me), but they will fix the problem I've been having with lighting, and hopefully in turn fix my problem with compositing, and hopefully in turn enable me to make my fun little show featuring puppets out in the bush. And that's about all the reason I need to buy expensive 'toys'.

There's something I haven't done in ages... ask a question of you lot. So, what's your favourite luxury item and why did you buy it?

Sewing

2008-02-27T12:12:00.005+11:00

Sorry about the delay... My op is now officially re-scheduled until April. Oh well, six more weeks of putting up with 'Evil Richard'. Hopefully he wont be too consuming over that time. He really can be a pain some days!

But that's alright, I spent the time constructively. Learning how to sew. It really is a lot of fun... yuh, I know, like, totally gay! The cat is my first attempt at sewing, he's a hand puppet complete with inner sleeve to put one's hand (although the cat IS a little tight fitting - giggle! So very wrong) He's made from an old bed-spread and the face is a inter-changeable latex insert which was made with a similar process to Vlzerdko and Brun.

The bunny is Mooncar's first attempt to sew a puppet. Pretty cool huh! I made the face, which halved the production time... even cooler! Did you know you can bake brushing latex in a plaster mold at low temperatures (70 degrees Celsius) to reduce the curing time to a tenth of the time it usually takes? Me neither... I do now. How awesome is that for thick pieces of brushed latex... And as you know it too, pass it on. The rabbits face is about an inch thick in the nose part and it took about 5 hours in the oven to set. It usually wouldn't have set for about 5 days, or potentially ever, maintaining a sloppy inner core! Experimentation rocks!

If the rumour mill is to be believed, Bunny, a rod and stick puppet, will co-star in this years Easter film along with Vlzerdko and Brun. Hence the cool de-saturated look of the photo. It is meant to be some 3rd world eastern block country... their cameras wouldn't be as good as mine :) Anyway, it's something to keep me interested while waiting for the head thingy to resolve itself. No I haven't forgotten that I'm working on the Sprites, the Easter film this year's really an attempt to work out some of my ongoing production issues with the Sprites material. Maybe I should just pitch to the AB friggin C, they're apparently short of content at the moment, and let them bring people into the project who can fix those issues for me.

Hurumph, then I'd have to give up ancillary rights... maybe it's worth it just to get stuff produced properly... who know's? It's such a confusing business!

Watchabeandoon?

2008-02-18T11:22:00.003+11:00

So, what have you been doing?

I've been doing the usual stuff. Watching the Cricket. Setting up a bird cage for the arrival of our new budgie in a couple of weeks. Making Choc-mint slice. Learning how to use a sewing machine. Playing with the Sprites characters. You know, the usual stuff!

Actually talking of slice and sewing, this will be the post before the big slice and dice. A couple of days from now I'll be officially tumour free. Yay for that! Not so 'yay' for hanging around hospital for 5 days while the Frankenstein style facial reconstructive patchwork settles into place. Or the 3 weeks after that I'll be hanging around at home getting used to my new look head. I'll certainly be checking in here for the next couple of days but after Thursday (my time - Friday your time) who knows when I'll make it back to the web.

In the mean time here's another one of the minor characters in the Sprites. Her name is Wattle. You may need to search amongst the flowers with your mouse to find her.

Stay cool, one and all!

UPDATE: My surgery has been cancelled. Not sure when it'll happen now. Doh!

Oh well, pass on all your good wishes to the poor guy with face and mouth cancer who took operation time-slot. I saw this guy on Friday last during my pre-op clinic... when you see a guy who's a little dead in the eyes and his nose and cheeks are completely burnt by chemotheraphy... well, makes you appreciate just how good a beign tumour can be. Hope that guy does well tomorrow!

CarrotLegs

2008-02-08T11:04:00.000+11:00

Is the name that was given to this character after one of my workmates saw the original of the sketch in the last post. The name has just kind of stuck since then. So here's the puppet that I made from that sketch.

He's (Yes, after much debate at our house, it's a he... apparently) certainly got that 'hand-made' quality of a prototype but what do you expect from a little fella made from an old work sock (washed of course!).

I don't think much of his stripes. Some of which where wet when this photo was taken making them a little messy looking but they contract as they dry. So rather than use fabric-paint as I did here I'd probably get them sewn on before the 'sock' became a puppet. Either way, I still think he's terribly cute for a minor character... well, as cute as a 45 minute puppet making effort can be any way. I have about twenty or so designs of these types of puppets all based on various birds and animals and so forth but I'll probably only make one or two more, just to illustrate their use in the show. I don't think sewing is really my strong point.

CarrotLegs

Besides being an old sock he's actually a birdy-spirit of one of these fellas, or at least their cousins, who live not to far from my place. The ones that actually fly over my place, about three times a year (they're rare birds), tend to be the Short Bill Black Cockatoo which have yellow cheeks and tail. But hey, I thought red looked cool!

Red Tailed Black Cockatoo

Like all Black Cockatoos, CarrotLegs can be terribly cheeky and likes to make loud squawking noises for no other reason than it gives people a fright when they're not expecting it. But this is usually just to cover up the fact that he is really very shy and likes to hide away very high up in trees where no one can find him. He usually takes your car-keys with him, which is where they go when you think you've misplaced them, and will only return them when you're completely frustrated or when you ask him nicely for them back.

All things too cute

2008-02-04T10:32:00.000+11:00

The more I keep playing with the Sprites' design, the more I keep coming up with terribly cute things.

Sometimes, just sometimes, I can't stand it any more. That's when things like this happen...

Of course, the original drawing IS very cute. I'm sure there will be plenty more stuff like this, minus the gross-out, on offer during the development of the Sprites.

Random picture

2008-02-01T12:21:00.000+11:00

The mad Dr Fergus Gnaagle chooses a brain for his latest evil robot.

Why do I always end up with a half-finished badly-imagined random-picture like this on my desk?

They're so craptacular, well, OK, kinda funny but quite poorly drawn.

I guess it's because they're drawn in 20 second blocks over several hours in between my normal work duties. I mean, look at that pathetic robot... he's not evil... he's barely even rendered. And don't even get me started on that lack-lustre excuse for a head choosing machine. I mean, why is there a music keyboard? And the background is just terribly boring... the machine should integrate into some other bigger more complex machine in the background. And Dr Fergus Gnaagle should be short and tiny and on top of a really tall ladder to reach the controls.

Hmmm... I wonder what would actually happen if I thought about what I was going to draw and then spent more than a total of 5 minutes on it. I should try that sometime.

So, what should I draw?

Where da hell...

2008-01-25T10:18:00.000+11:00

Man, what's going on in this place...

*tumble weed rolls through*

Had to go and look at the statcounter just to make sure this thing was still on. Yup, plenty of hits. Just hardly from anyone I know. I guess no-one's reading so I can call you all turds. Ha! Just jokes.

It appears the only people landing here are searching for the Terry Gilliam film below. It's cancelled people. The ill-luck of Terry G strikes again. Fuggitaboudit!

I also seem to have a lot of searches for Mary Poopings, Bird Genitals, and Sex Feel Live Acting... obviously there are some fairly odd people out there, desperately searching for the type of odd people that used to come here... wherever they've gone.

Oh well, I did find this while trying to find out how my blog fits into the search for Sex Feel Live Acting.

Now THAT's some good Sex Feel Live Acting if ever I saws it!

Peace out! Turds!

The Imaginarium of Dr Parnassus

2008-01-23T09:18:00.000+11:00

Who would have imagined...

Despite the disturbing piece of crap that was Tideland I was looking forward to this. Mostly because Heath Ledger not only proved he'd actually learnt how to act, somewhere between 2003 and 2005 anyway, but also because he wasn't afraid to pick some of the most interesting and challenging scripts in Hollywood. We have this movie. About two cowboys. They have sex a lot. Interested? Gutsy! and beautifully acted. He'd certainly come a long way from Ten Things I Hate About You, Two Hands, or A Knights Tale. I guess we'll still get to see him as a psychotic, mass-murdering clown later this year. So his last role will be as a crass pop culture icon in grease paint rather than a thoughtful hard-to-play Gilliam induced role. They probably both adequately reflect Heath's career, I wonder which one he'll be remember for...

"There are no rules and there is no rulebook.
At the end of the day, it all comes down to my instincts. "
Heath Ledger

Oh well, we all get it wrong sometimes...

Fast food IS bad for you.

2008-01-21T12:13:00.000+11:00

"I was this close to getting my Big Mac."

What a fat idiot. What? Never heard of room service? For 30G I would have flown down to Melbourne, bought him a Big Mac (or ten by the looks of him, I think that's even a serve of fries in his front pocket) and brought it to his room. Hell, I would have even chewed it for him and I hate Maccas.

Oh well, Serves him right! We can't all be that stupid.

Wow, I think I'm going to take this job!

2008-01-18T10:43:00.000+11:00

Just got an email through the school for a job with a Sydney based company that needs some filming done at some of their Sex Workshops.

Now, work is work but apparently these people are Sexperts and they're offering advice like this...

--------------------------
Sex Advice, super sex tips, sex sexcrets revealed, sexual energy, Sexpert, Australian Sex Coach, how to have great sex, love toys, Sex Workshops, ideas to spark up the relationships, unleash your sexuality and

Sex Secrets Revealed
50 simple ways to heat her up...
and a few ideas for what to do

Buy her a silk thong - Pass it under the table at a restaurant and ask her to go to the ladies' room and change into it. Now that's a first date I would love to video!

Embrace her until she makes the move to leave - Don't underestimate the heating power of a great hug, especially when she initiates it. Make it clear you don't want the hug to end. I challenge anyone to do this for more than 3 or 4 seconds. That wont be weird at all!

Wear her name - Write her name on your shoulder, your hand, or any place she'll have a chance of spotting it. It's a tattoo without pain--one that gives only pleasure. "It will make her laugh and think you're so adorable," says Davidson. "It says, 'You matter.' " No, it either says, 'I'm an obsessive freak' or it says, 'I can't remember your name'.

Whisper into her ear - In public tell her what you want to do to her later: "Tonight, I'm going to make you have as many orgasms as possible." OK, I just tried that and although my Boss says she's understanding I think macing an employee in response is just going too far... maybe I shouldn't have tried it in the workplace.

Make yourself sick - Leave love notes around the house--in the fridge, on the bathroom mirror, under her pillow. That much sweetness might make you nauseous, but it'll make her feel like a lovesick teenager. You're sick alright! She will be wondering how you got into her apartment. Answer: Through the bathroom window... I know officer, but really, it was only 4 stories up and she DID leave the window open.

Apply her lipstick - Shave her legs, paint her toenails, or brush or wash her hair. And get her to call you Mommy. You really might want to get her permission before trying this stuff. Cause that's... wait, *looks at the next piece of advice*

Make a bedroom burrito - While you're rolling around in bed, wrap her up in the sheet so she can't do anything with her arms (think burrito or straitjacket). Leave her head, shoulders, and lower legs uncovered. It's simple, spontaneous, and soft-core. Um... if by 'rolling around in the bedroom' you mean 'struggling with her in the bedroom' you really don't have her permission do you?! That's a felony dude. Leave her alone and seek help!

Go into the closet - Novelty is an aphrodisiac. With unusual settings, with strange sensations, smells, and muffled sounds, will make sex feel new. Confined spaces add urgency. Why do I get the impression the only muffled sounds will be her screams. Although now I understand this type of advice, confined spaces, in the closet? You mean like a car boot don't you! This advice is really for serial killers who are secretly gay and want to torture the opposite sex.
--------------------------

You'd have to be completely clueless to go to these people for sex advice. Wow, could you imagine even combining two or three of these on a date; Hug her and don't let go, ask her to wear a thong and then try to put on her make up. Gosh you'd be totally 'in'. Wait, I'm not sure I'd want to date a girl who'd let me do that...

I guess it could make for an interesting job.

Pink Candies

2008-01-17T09:57:00.000+11:00

Now that's really weird. Someone found my blarg by Googling Pink Smokers Lollies. These are the lollies (sweets or candy to the English... apparently a lolly is an ice-block in England. Although I have no idea what an American would call an ice-block... you'd probably call them a popsicle or something weird... bet an ice-block to you would sound like a type of crystal methamphetamine) ... what... what was I saying... oh yeah, These are the lollies I use to quite smoking. And in New Zealand they're actually called Pink Smokers. What's wrong with the name 'Musks' New Zealand? I wonder why anyone would name a sweet after anything to do with smoking? Maybe they're made from ex-smokers. Mmmm, ex-smokers are musky! Actually, that doesn't sound appetising at all. Although these do...

Cause they're just so damn cool. Although I used to get the Stallion brand, now they were a tough brand to pretend to smoke until they were kinda soggy and sticky and then eat. Yep, tough like a regular Marlboro pre-Teen...

Either way, still not smoking. All thanks to little pink... um, Smokers Lollies! Although I have noticed that... stones in shoes, people who sniff on the train, when your partner locks the front door but the back door is wide open while you're home so that to get back inside you have to walk all the way around the house, 'retro' t-shirts, voicemail messages of people hanging up after the beep, white people who think they're black, broken ATMs, slow walkers, slow walkers, slow walkers, did I mention slow walkers, dead batteries, dust, showing off clothing tags, mobile phone ringtones, having to search for the end of the cellotape with your fingernail, oh, and everything ever... IS REALLY FUCKING ANNOYING WHEN YOU DON'T SMOKE!!!!

Oh, I know it's annoying anyway but when you're a smoker none of those things (except for maybe slow walkers) make you fantasise about buying high powered weapons.

Jus' sum'n I bin werk'n on....

2008-01-09T16:58:00.000+11:00

Errr, that title sounds like that annoying Star Warts character... sorry!

But the picture is Purty... although needs some flowers to bring colour into the environment... and the foreground vine needs to have some of the contrast taken out of the green... and apparently, there needs to be some fish playing poker. I just wish I knew what type of fish, everything I've tried that looks OK just aren't fresh-water fish and I'm not about to include fish if it means overlooking that kind of detail.

Anyway, I've actually been re-working the designs of this, in the hope it will be produced one day... soon (in film terms anyway). This environment, the Sprites home, should look better once I've digitally stitched together live-action elements, you know, so the water actually flows and stuff. The Sprites look different now too, much more... less wholly Asian, more reflective of the multi-cultural society 'children's productions'... I mean 'Sprites' live in.

As for the Sprites themselves, they're none too happy about this but seeing as you can't copyright an ancient nature spirit I'm not too worried about using the name 'Sprites'. Although, if I can come up with another name I may just use it... we do have little nature spirits here in Australia that are known to help lost children, it's just a shame that they're name is not as cool as Sprites. Well, OK, it is but it doesn't fit into my theme song. Which is soooo important.

So, what would you call these little critters?

UPDATE: (just so SafeT will quit hassling me about fish!)

Nicotine Cold Turkey

2008-01-04T12:31:00.001+11:00

They say bad things come in threes. Well so does quitting cigarettes cold turkey, for me anyway. 3 days, 3 weeks, and 3 months. If you can get past these hurdles then you're well on your way to quitting smoking. Mind you I've done them all before and a couple of years later when you're least expecting it you'll be drinking home made spirits in an Eastern Block country with people you can't understand and it'll seem like a totally sensible thing to take up smoking again. Being an addict is sooo much fun!

So if you're any type of real smoker, not just the alcohol-fuelled-waste-a-ma

tes- smoke-by-awkwardly-bum-sucking-it-while-thinking-you-look-terribly-sophisticated type of smoker, then the first three days of quitting cigs are going to be a whole world of 'fucked up'.

So here's what you do... oh no, this isn't 'help you quit' tutorial this is a 'conciliatory pat on the back, oh you poor bastard don't put yourself through those three days unless you really want to succeed at not smoking' sort of thing... So here's what you do...

Don't plan a day to quit smoking, screw that, that's seriously way too much pressure, those first 3 days are bad enough without adding days of anticipation to them. Just know you're about too quit and buy your smokes one pack at a time, don't buy another pack until the last one is finished (smoking your last cigarette on the way to get another pack is totally allowed). If you smoke the last of a pack just before you're going to bed for the night, congratulations, you've won the crappiest lottery of all, tomorrow you're giving up cigarettes. Hey, that's what you wanted right?

Now, for the first three days you can expect to spend about 40mins of every hour feeling shit, but at least it's an infinitely variable and often indescribable type of shit. Everything from body aches to complete mental distraction. If you really want to avoid these feelings there's pretty much only three ways to stop them; The easiest, smoke a cigarette; no? Sleep!; You have to be awake? Try shooting yourself in the face with a hand gun. That's about it. Otherwise you'll just have to get used to feeling like crap.

The only other thing to do is eat lollies and/or citrus fruits. For me it's little pink musk lollies or Dutch salted liquorice, distinctive strong flavours. But remember they're not cigarettes, they wont stop you feeling like crap, and you'll look completely gay while shovelling pink sweets into your mouth while feeling sick from all the sugar. But at least it's a distraction. Talking of distraction, limit your social interaction. You'll be no good to anyone. Especially with all your inane stupid comments about how much you really want a smoke. Really, shut up and stay home. And get Drunk!

Oh yes, you absolutely must do this for the first three days. No excuses. The moment you get home in the evening crack open a beer, pour a wine, a snifter of port, or a shot of whatever. Nine hundred and ninety nine times out of a thousand the moment you start drinking you'll have a cigarette. Why put yourself though three days of agony if you're just going to fuck it up with the first beer. No. If you really want to give up cigarettes, you must absolutely do it drunk. If you can't do it drunk you'll be back to smoking in a matter of weeks.

So that's it. 'Enjoy' your first three days nicotine free. After that, you'll be much more 'with it', you may even be presentable in public, and you'll only feel like crap for about 5 minutes out of every hour when you get a craving. They're pretty easy to distract yourself from, have another pink lolly ya gaywad!

That'll last for about 3 weeks. The 3rd week's the killer, there's nothing quite like the low but ever present pain of nicotine being ripped out of your muscle mass by an addicted body, but then you'll be nicotine free. Then you've only got about 3 months of psychological cravings... little events that trigger a craving. Like eating a meal. Most people have a smoke after a meal and for three months you'll probably feel like one after every meal. It's psychological! As in, it's something your brain invented based on your actions and it doesn't really exist except in your head. Really, who wants to give in to a craving that doesn't really exist? If you're that type of person you may as well have shot yourself in the face during the first three days.

After that, you'll actually be a reformed smoker. And then all you've really got to worry about is drinking home made spirits in an Eastern Block country.

Why is that post still there?

2008-01-02T13:34:00.000+11:00

Cause I've had a very happy Xmas and New Year.

How about you?

Shave that Monkey and call it a mental patient

2007-12-19T15:26:00.000+11:00

Being able to call myself an Auteur is one of those little luxuries born out of the necessity of making small independent films where, besides the voice talent, I've done all the work. When I started out it just made it cheaper (free!) and easier.

But in the bigger world of film it's quite possible that if you honestly think you're Auteur then it probably means that no-one really wants to work with you. I think that's probably the most disappointing thing about school this semester was that I only had one crew member from the school, the rest being friends. Sure it was because my film was a last minute inclusion to the shoot roster and I, being a part-timer, had a lot less time to meet and schmooze other students into coming along for the ride but I still ended up in that role of Auteur. Driving the production, making all the arrangements, and making all the decisions... As a Director, this is exactly what you do not want!

Probably the best time I had in terms of production was working with another proper student filmmaker, his film won a lot of awards (a great indication of his ability to lead his crew and he's not completely clueless), who did camera on one night of my shoot. He doesn't have a lot of experience on camera and he did start the night asking all those questions about camera operation that should have been answered long before we were turning on a camera to shoot. But the difference is, once he realised I didn't particularly care, he started making the decisions for himself. (Of course I was feigning indifference, sheesh, that's probably a risk most filmmakers wouldn't take but I pretty much knew he had it in him and we were 'only doing a student documentary').

THIS is the way to make films! Sure, as a Director, make sure your crew know what you expect. And this other Director cum documentary camera man and I had a pretty good understanding of what was needed. But you've got to trust your crew to take that information and turn it into camera positions, lighting set-ups, camera moves, sound... basically footage that's of use to an editor. Every crew role is a specialisation, I challenge any Director to have all the answer all the time regarding these specialist jobs. No. You need those crew members to be telling you how to make things happen. And still, a lot of young Directors find this really hard. They have a vision. They have the answers. They have to make it perfect. They have gotta relax or they'll be working by themselves very quickly.

Now that doesn't mean that if you see something you don't like you sit on your hands and trust the crew member will work it out. By all means, call 'Cut' and say something, it'll be better for everyone... particularly the editor. But you still need to treat that person like a professional, undermining their confidence is only going to get a whole lot of decision making pushed back onto your shoulders. Trust me, you'll have plenty of decisions to make as it is. And of course once you call 'Roll' again you can't hold their hand, THEY still have to do the job they're assigned too.

So that's it. I'm totally done with being an Auteur. I want to make films. Not force them into existence. Next semester I have no choice except to be a crew member (if anything at all), no Director's position for me (Yay!), and whether I'm boom swinging, clapper loading, pushing a dolly, or placing props on a set, I hope the Director isn't an Auteur and I don't make them call 'Cut' too often.

Comedy

2007-12-14T09:46:00.000+11:00

You can all ignore these posts if you want.
These are really for my own benefit in order to set down some of the thoughts
I've had after the semester.

After the Awards Night on Wednesday, one of the staff I was talking to, who is excellent at what he does BTW (not just an excellent teacher but also a formidable practitioner of his art - like the majority of the SFS teachers actually), turned to one of his co-workers and said something like, "all he did was make jokes but he still wants us to take him seriously".

Now, I wasn't intended to hear that and there's a good chance that I may have misheard the statement, the music was loud, but even if it was close to what he said I could quote the motto's about compassion these staff seem to hold dear but I'd rather respond in my typically flippant way with, 'Well Duh!' (Eloquent ain't I)

So, because I have a sense of humour I'm not meant to be taken seriously?

Try having your 'serious experimental student documentary on balancing environment and heritage' (ha, now that's comedy!) stifled by the State Government, where one of your only reasons for not shooting it anyway is because you don't want your learning institution to come under fire if you get caught filming it. Then see if you can (or want) to come up with another piece in under a week with a similarly 'serious' subject matter.

Then I want your new idea to come second in the vote only to have it not even short-listed. Have the email telling you this sent to the wrong address. With only hours before the 'green light' announcement I want you to hear and deal with this news, pull it together, then go to the documentary producers and in 15 minutes not only argue for your idea but also convince them to add you to the short list AND green light your project.

I then want you to find out you have a tumour but wait six days before they can tell you if it's the type that will kill you or just disfigure your face.

During those six days, I also want you to take on the huge project of manufacturing characters (in a way you've never done before) over a short time frame for another director because you believe strongly in her vision, the medium with which she's chosen to express that vision, and because the people who said they would help her have conveniently forgotten their promise (something all too common in the student environment but something I despise nonetheless).

I then want you to go shoot your film idea with only one other 'trained' but non-english speaking crew member in several locations, fitting it around specialist appointments, cat scans and biopsies. Oh yeah, and you've still got make a film good enough, with no editor, to capture the majority of the audience vote on the most competitive night of the festival to win the only 'award' you know you're going to receive because you broke too many 'documentary conventions and rules' to ensure the film was what you said it would be at it's inception... 'comedic'.

Sure I only made a comedic documentary (is that easy?), but comedy films are designed to elicit laughter from the audience. Comedies are light-hearted, crafted to amuse, entertain, and provoke enjoyment. The comedy genre humorously exaggerates the situation, the language, action, and characters. Comedies observe the deficiencies, foibles, and frustrations of life, providing merriment and a momentary escape from day-to-day life. They usually have happy endings, although the humour may have a serious or pessimistic side. And that's exactly what I made and the audience loved it.

Here are some of the complex raft of interwoven comedic devices I used to make the film work for an audience.
_________________

Slapstick: Slapstick was predominant in the earliest silent films, since they didn't need sound to be effective, and they were popular with non-English speaking audiences. This is primitive and universal comedy with broad, aggressive, physical, and visual action, including harmless or painless cruelty and violence, horseplay, and often vulgar sight gags.

Deadpan: This form of comedy was best exemplified by the expression-less face of stoic comic hero Buster Keaton. The modern master of this form is Bill Murray.

Verbal comedy: This was classically typified by the cruel verbal wit of W. C. Fields, the sexual innuendo of Mae West, or the verbal absurdity of dialogues in the Marx Brothers films, or later by the self-effacing, thoughtful humour of Woody Allen's literate comedies.

Black or Dark Comedy: These are dark, sarcastic, humorous, or sardonic stories that help us examine otherwise ignored darker serious, pessimistic subjects such as war, death, or illness. Two of the greatest black comedies ever made include the following: Stanley Kubrick's Cold War classic satire from a script by co-writer Terry Southern, Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (1964) that spoofed the insanity of political and military institutions with Peter Sellers in a triple role (as a Nazi scientist, a British major, and the US President), and Robert Altman's M*A*S*H (1970), an irreverent, anti-war black comedy set during the Korean War. Another more recent classic black comedy was the Coen Brothers' violent and quirky story Fargo (1996) about a pregnant Midwestern police chief (Oscar-winning Frances McDormand) who solves a 'perfect crime' that went seriously wrong.

Parody or Spoof - also Satire, Lampoon and Farce: These specific types of comedy (also called put-ons, send-ups, charades, lampoons, take-offs, jests, mockumentaries, etc.) are usually a humorous or anarchic take-off that ridicules, impersonates, punctures, scoffs at, and/or imitates (mimics) the style, conventions, formulas, characters (by caricature), or motifs of a serious work, film, performer, or genre; This category may also include these widely diverse forms of satire - usually displayed as political or social commentary.
_________________

Yup, all of these devices were used, sometimes in conjunction with each other, in 'THIS is Alan Chapman'. And let's not forget that this was a Documentary. I had little control over my subject, so I had to sort through hours of footage to find these moments, there are some weaknesses in the films structure I agree, but you can't sacrifice the story content to put in suitable comedic moments. They must flow with the story.

So, do you really think I'm not taking the film-making process seriously. Or is it that you focussed a little heavily on the fact that I use my sense of humour to deal with tough situations/times? (and usually only with people who I like)

OK, now I've had my little moment of defensiveness... I wouldn't have changed the last six months for anything. I really did learn a bundle and enjoy every moment of it.

DONE!

2007-12-13T09:23:00.000+11:00

Well, as much as a person can be done when making films.

But I'm certainly done watching the 65 films over the last two days of the festival. There is a sincere depth of talent at the school that resulted in some absolutely incredible films made this semester. It must be said they were not only the work of some wonderfully imaginative Directors, the films that really impressed were those whose entire crew pushed themselves (tirelessly) to bring the film to the screen. If you ever want to study film you could go to a more renowned learning institution but I don't think you'll find many places that allow film-makers the freedom and encouragement of ideas, or the understanding of the need for 'space' film-makers need to find those ideas as Sydney Film School. The school's faculty and board should be really proud of what they're doing in that little building in Waterloo.

Having said that, gawd there was some crap made there too. I made the point of watching all the films produced this semester... I felt like tearing out my eyes at some points. It's so hard when you're a student learning a craft and you go well beyond your means for producing or even fully understanding the ideas you have. But for all those people who fell into that trap I can say that I learnt more from watching those films than I did watching all the films that were beautifully resolved and produced.

So, how'd we do with THIS is Alan Chapman...

Red Door background by Lindsay Anne Black - I love web communities!!!!
Speaking of, a HUGE thank you to Ticharu as well for the use of his music.

Well, GREAT! The film was played on the opening night, a wonderful session for it to be included in as it has the biggest audience and most exposure along with the best crafted films the school can offer.

Now, I could focus on the fact that come awards night none of the judges had a single mention for 'THIS is Alan Chapman' but I fully expected that, a comedic documentary about a non-Australian subject that used a lot of devices normally reserved for Drama was certainly not going to compete with the beautifully turned out doco's which took a more traditional vent on 'serious' subjects. But I can say that 'THIS is Alan Chapman' achieved what it set out to do;

Firstly, to get Alan back up on stage, and didn't THAT work out a treat. After shooting in a Playhouse, Alan was offered an audition and now has his first stage role in 20 years playing Enobarbus in Shakespeare's 'Antony and Cleopatra'. He has since secured himself an agent and continues to be put up for more auditions. Having a real life effect with your film is one of the most fulfilling things I've ever experienced;

And secondly, to help people connect with a film's content by making them laugh. A full cinema audience pealing with laughter again and again is terribly humbling. It's a strange experience knowing you've made an audience come alive like that. I had to sink below the level of my seat to deal with the quiet warmth that creeps into your heart during such an experience. It certainly achieved that aim better than I could have hoped. In fact, it connected with the audience so well on that level it garnered the opening nights Audience Award for Best Documentary. Awww shucks, it appears if you make them laugh they will follow you anywhere!

What else... Oh, forehead slap! Of course, the PUPPET FILM! 'Water off a duck's back' was the first Stop Motion made at Sydney Film School. It only won BEST FILM in FESTIVAL! Pia (Director and Set Designer), Jesse (Animator), Pia's Dad (Armatures and Props) worked their asses off to make that film happen. The final film was brilliant and truly deserving of the award. It was certainly nice to be part of the team that helped bring it into existence. Well done Pia Dulu, I'm terribly proud of what she achieved!

So what's next, SLEEP! And then I'm going to try and get as much work done before my operation... oh yeah, can't forget that I've been doing all this while dealing with a tumour... pat on the back for me, can't believe I kept it all together... let's see how I do now I don't have any distractions.

Repost

2007-11-26T14:02:00.000+11:00

So I've finished the puppets, finished the essay, finished my lunch, and now just have the seemingly never ending tinkering with the final touches on sound, music, shot order on the infamous Doco o' mine. I thought I'd repost something, something I'd forgotten I'd even done, that should keep you somewhat entertained until I can actually think of something new to post.

Hope you're all peachy out there. Enjoy!

Little Jame was a strange boy.

He was not like other children.

But it was not because...

of his funny smell.

Or because of his leg that was...

shorter than the other

Or because when the other kids would play...

he would sit in the corner singing sad songs in a French accent.

Or because his only friend was Graham, a stuffed rabbit...

who set fires.

It was because...

Jame had a secret.

A secret that none of the other kids knew...

something that even Graham couldn’t set on fire.

Jame knew that one day he would grow up...

To be a beautiful young woman.

The End

The young Star of the Film

2007-11-12T09:16:00.000+11:00

For my first real effort at making a 'proper' Stop-motion puppet (my previous wire armature puppets were not nearly this refined) I guess the young lad is a pretty good effort. As a stop motion puppet that needs to be utilised as part of a film... He could be sooo much better. The materials used (a brushing latex outer skin with a 2 part polyurethane foam core over a machined steel armature) seem to work but there are obvious limits and issues with this type of construction. The skin needs to be relatively thick (about 1mm) to make sure that it doesn't tear when removing the puppet from the mould. This also appears to be about the exact amount that exerts enough pressure on the joints of the armature to make some poses impossible to hold. We found a way around the issue, but only because the puppet will be wearing a costume. If it was, say, a dinosaur, which wasn't wardrobed to cover up the small adjustments made to the puppet post-moulding then we would have been in all sorts of dilemmas.

That's one puppet down and one puppet to go. The next puppet is smaller than this one, the above puppet is only half a foot high, and I found sculpting at this scale a little difficult. Just a lack of practice at this scale I guess. Hope I can make the new one look and work OK.

PS. I realise now that if it ever looks like I'll get one of my children's shows up for production I'm going to have to delete this blog.

What time is it? I have no idea. Really!

2007-10-29T10:08:00.000+11:00

So, a couple of weeks ago I was walking through the film studio part of the school when I noticed one of our young female directors diligently working on a wonderful little 1:6 scale set. Of course this means one of two things, she cant find a location to suit her film and decided to do a miniature instead, or her film was entirely 1:6 scale. As the set was of a pretty typical looking Australian backyard I figured it wasn't a location issue, no, this set had the definite smell of, well, paint and glue actually, but speaking metaphorically it smelt of one of my favourite things ever... that's right...

I nonchalantly stopped and started chatting... yes, this was indeed a set for a Stop Motion film. Excitement! Great to know that type of project was being endorsed by the School. As we discussed the medium, history of stop motion, her story, etc, it came to light that she was having a little trouble with the guys making her puppets. They weren't making them. In fact, her production didn't seem to have any progressed further than having some photos of what the puppets should kinda look like. Although, she did have some of the most beautifully crafted armatures, the metal moveable skeletons inside a Stop Motion Puppet, I have ever seen. I mean, I've used wire armatures myself but these things were machined metal with alan key adjustments on the individual ball joints. Um, these things are what the pro's use... in a student film... um... "I've done a little sculpting, mould making, casting ... in essence I make puppets!" Of course... not quite this sophisticated before. "oh, you need them on set in a few days... um... let me think... I'm Directing a documentary... a lot of work, I have to write an essay... a lot of work. I have a day job... a lot of work. No, I absolutely cannot... say no to working on this level with puppets."

So that's where I am at the moment. Every spare moment. Until at least 2am. Sculpting under a magnifying glass. Embedding finished models in clay. Pouring difficult undercut multi-medium multiple part moulds. Making sure armatures are properly prepared and in working order. Shopping for chemicals that when mixed together properly create flexible foams. Running tests on every single part of the process to make sure I know how to use those chemicals. Basically, planning for every possible thing that could go possibly go wrong in the final casting because I only have a few days to make these puppets before they're due on set.

I'm obviously crazy, well, maybe not... After shopping for chemicals the other day I stopped in on a mates place for a BBQ (Their place is close to the shop I went too and they were offering us dinner, perfect!) and as I was saying see-ya-laters I mentioned to some other friends why I had to take off early. Well apparently their son runs this place. I'll set up a meeting with him when he's back from a major make-up job in Bollywood to have a look at his studio... Bonus!

Well I hope you're all not as busy as me but I hope you're having fun out there.

Just plain crazy!

2007-10-18T08:55:00.000+10:00

I just realised I haven't used this place to bitch. What's a blog without a good bitch session. Actually... that's not my style. Le choisir la vie*, and all that. And this really isn't a bitch session it's more of a 'what the hell, I can't believe that happened' session spiced with a slightly bitchy attitude.

So I'm doing a DOP** role on this other Directors doco. You know that thing directors supposedly say, 'Lights, Camera, Action'. Yeah, a DOP is who the Director is talking to on the first two, Lights and Camera. Now, we are shooting a hard scene. It's a group of six people*** who don't know each other around a dinner table having an open and frank discussion on their views of modern marriage. All covered by two cameras and only one boom. So? I hear you thinking. Screw you, you ignorant git! This is incredibly hard on a scripted shoot, people win Oscars for getting this type of thing right... nice work Woody Allen! But for a documentary it's a situation only the bravest filmmakers put themselves in, let alone students. Eh, I can fuck it up, "I'm only a student!". Yeah, let's shoot it, why not.

So anyway, I rock up to this house. It's chaos. Now a film shoot is normally chaos. But really! Its organised chaos. Anyone who's been on location can walk into the bedlam and see exactly the calm little centre which is the focal point of a talented group a frenetic techs and artists working towards a common goal. So when I say 'it's chaos' I mean, there's no direction here at all, it's a complete and utter shambles. This is not good. This is in fact, very, very bad. Right, two hours to show time. I'm slowly gathering people to a common focus. Lights go up. Hidden**** microphones are set about the place. Replacement cameramen are sourced for someone who's not coming due to sickness. Briefings are given on the game plan. Lots of questions asked. Lots of answers are given. An hour to show time it's starting to look like a location shoot now. Frenzied but focussed.

Breathing easier. My french speaking Director comes over, 'can you have a look at this for me and tell me what you think it means?'. Bring it! It's only one more thing! Oh. My. God. Is this a recipe? For the dinner party you are giving in an hour? A quick search of the kitchen confirms all the hub-bub going on in in there for the last hour was really only the boiling of water and the cutting up of chicken... Oh. My. God. You do know how to cook this dinner right? No? You do know that you're cooking a pan risotto for the main course which will take a lot of time and attention and at least an hour right? No? You do know I'm suddenly feeling as ill as the other cameraman who was coughing up blood? No? ... ... ...I think I need to lie down for a second. Ah, nup. You can do two things in a situation like this, you can let your director and their project die, die, die a slow horrible embarrassing death and laugh maniacally while it happens (oh sweet Schadenfreude, don't tempt me), or you can FUCKING COOK DINNER FOR TEN PEOPLE!

Forget the shoot plan... I'm now a fucking chef. It's a flurry of wooden spoons, pans, and stock absorption into Arborio rice. 20 minutes til people arrive. Director, 'Richard, I vant to do a veb houk-up to a LesBian 'o is married. We can 'ave zi compuutor on zi table so she can talk vit di dinner guest, yes?'. The hot pan hits her in the face, I held it there long enough for the smell of chicken risotto to be overpowered by the sweet aroma of cooking flesh. When the police arrived they slapped me on the back and said 'well done' and stayed long enough to compliment my excellent risotto and drink a glass of fine Barossa Shiraz with the toast of 'Fuck the French!' At least that's what happened in my mind. How are we going to record the sound of this person? Who's going to film her? Do you understand what the term 'dial-up internet connection' means? Are you for FUCKING real? Don't be coming into 'Ma Cuisine' and fuck with my dinner preparation over a stupid, stupid, stupid idea like that! I think I said, 'You're crazy'... and that's when the first guest arrived.

Oh dear, we've missed the guests arrival. Second camera, get a fucking tape in that tape-recordy thing and start filming. Oh, you're trying to hook up a Web interview for the dinner party? NO YOU ARE NOT. START FILMING... Oh, you're going to do what the Director says and not me. Sure. Why not. Let's miss the guests arrival shall we Ms Director? Good. Great. 20 minutes later. Risotto is ready. Guests have arrived. Web hook-up doesn't work... say it with me, 'Dial up connection isn't great for streaming video'. 'Yes, Ms Director, I can certainly take over organising the crew while you drink wine with your guests. Not a problem*****. '

We taped the dinner party minus webcam. For a discussion on modern marriage boy did that Christian couple talk a lot about the wonder that is a life knowing Christ. Four hours of tape later... I tuned out somewhere along the way... the camera was set on a wide angle a lot... I was unfed by a dinner I had cooked... I was tired from standing on my feet for two hours behind a camera after cooking a dinner for ten people... I stole a random glass of wine from the table and just started drinking it... I don't know whose it was... It was shit, cheap red wine... I don't care... I drank it... and another... and hell why not another... and no, sorry Ms Director, I don't care what you say. THAT was NOT a successful shoot.

Note to self... Next time I encounter a film shoot that unprofessional, walk out and be damned the consequences. Although it may be the first time in the history of film that someone gets the credit, 'DOP and Head Chef'. I wonder if I can take an Alan Smithee.

-------------------------------

*'To choose the life'. Some sort of flippant motto of mine when penguins start bitch'n about their self created situations. Kind of a 'Hey, you chose to be there and do that so don't start with all that 'woe is me' crap.

** I like to think it stands for Director of Pornography but unfortunately the P stands for penguins.

*** What else would they be? Penguins?

****I'm really a CIA agent... yeah, OK, the mics are only hidden from the penguins... ah, cameras...

*****Fuck the French Penguins !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2007-10-04T15:59:00.001+10:00

Post 101

2007-09-24T08:30:00.000+10:00

Another milestone... 101 posts, which is kinda like 101 Dalmatians without the yapping, bad smelling canned food, and pee stained carpet. Wait... no, it's completely like 101 Dalmatians.

I've been preparing for my Documentary shoot tommorrow. It's going to be one of those normal sort of days... shooting at a Theatre first thing in the morning with a traditional Shakespearean cross dressing actor, at a bicycle store with Unicycles and fire juggling after morning tea, then it's the playstation Pro Evo 6 one man soccer world championship after our catered lunch, and finally after dinner we're going to be going inter-galatic with a telescope powerful enough to see the lunar buggies left behind on the moon (damn those never-went-to-the-Moon conspiracy guys really made sure the little details were taken care of...). It's going to be a long, long, fun, fun, FUN day. I'm very much looking forward to it.

I was out shooting some Theatre pick-ups the other day and thought I'd include this in my production schedule...

You can see more beautiful creations over at Gnat of Glass' place! Third place rocks!

Hope everyone is having fun out there... stay cool!

-----------------------------

OK, let's keep this part short so all you lovely semi-concerned people are in the loop; biopsy on Wednesday morning to find out if my now confirmed tumour is a benign and friendly dictator or if it's one of those aggressive little buggers that looks all innocent up until a few seconds before it tries to kill me... with numchucku!

I got to tell my family about it on Saturday. A totally bizarre moment in life... I wasn't about to tell them about the lump (and have them upset for nothing) until I was in a position to tell them all the info and options, I guess knowing it's a tumour and what the Docs will do depending on what type of tumour is probably enough info to share with them... still, a weird thing to have to make those types of phone calls. And I can confirm that ringing up and saying in an excited voice, "Hey you'll never guess what I got... No, go on, guess... Oh, you'll never guess, a Tumour! Yay, that's right, I got a TuMour (implied French accented connotation)", is not the right way to break the news. Oh well, live and learn.

OK, enough celebrations...

2007-09-04T22:08:00.000+10:00

Me noggin gets a flog'n t'morra!

[Translation]

MRI scan on my head tomorrow so the surgeons can calculate the best way to operate.

------------

No need to wish me luck... The white doughnut (or white coffin as I call it) doesn't phase me. I'm not claustrophobic, I'll be fine. You can wish me luck on the results though. Let's hope it's a girl... no a boy... who wants the trouble of a girl going through their teens.

Hope you're all doing well.

------------

UPDATE: Had the test, see below, just waiting on the Specialist to have a look and give me a call.

I was searching YouTube to help give people an idea of what it's like. I wish it was like this;

But really it was more like this... just so you can get the full experience... turn your sound up very loud, put a white metal waste paper basket over your head, bang on the bin with a large metal spoon and play the following clip... keep doing this for 40 minutes.

Great isn't it...

No, not Dying... but it starts with a D

2007-08-30T09:45:00.000+10:00

Yeeeeeeees, that's correct, I'm now officially the Director of a little comedic documentary called 'THIS is Alan Chapman' (working title). Boy did I have to play it hard and fast to get this Doco green-lit.

The night before the announcement of green-lit documentaries I found out that I hadn't received an all important email, telling me that 'THIS is Alan Chapman' hadn't even been short-listed for production. What? I had come second in the class vote which is usually a good indication on being short-listed (not of being green-lit though).

I was at Film School to see some Slide Shows to Music* so I after I had cried in the corner for a while (actually, I ate a muesli bar while seething) I decided to go and see the Doco Producers and ask for some feedback on why the film hadn't been short-listed. Apparently compared to my first Doco idea they didn't think I would be that interested in making 'THIS is Alan Chapman'. What? I'm competing against my own idea... That's not right! I explained that I was competing against the film ideas from other students and not against myself, I believed very strongly in the ideas of the new film, and that I was sorry if only have a weeks prep before pitching didn't allow me to convey that during the pitch. Luckily, I hadn't known I was out of the running so I had written a Treatment (how and why the film should be shot) and I used that to explain why I believed the film should be made. They, of course, thanked me for talking to them but made it clear that the green-lit Doco's would be announced the following day. A nice way to say, 'too late buddy, should have talked to us earlier'.

So, despondent, I dragged myself to school the next day muttering to myself about how I would hold a boom pole** on someone else's production. And when they announced the three Doco's to be made this semester I was really struggling to decide which story I wanted to help make. Which meant I missed the moment where they said that they had decided to make a fourth Doco. Then people where shaking my hand and clapping me on the back and I was all, 'What? Leave me alone! I'm trying to decide which boom pole I want to hold.' It didn't take long before I figured out I'd been made Director.

*whew*

Never underestimate the power of showing you're passionate about your ideas. Of course, I have a reduced crew compared to the other productions and as I'm 'stealing' other Director's crew I'm going to do Camera Operator on another Director's film. Scheduling is going to be a reaaaal issue for me...

... who cares, I like hard work and I get to Direct a Documentary. Although, I think maybe I should change the title to WHO is Alan Chapman? Because no-one seems to know... the whole point of the Doco.

Alan comes from six generations of very successful people in English Stage and Screen. Actors, opera singers, playwrights, directors, producers. At 19, Alan (now 43) could have been like the rest of his family, successful, but in a matter of weeks Alan went from owning the title role in a motion picture and being signed by a well known Agent to not being allowed to Act within England. He was blacklisted by the Stage and Screen Union. Oooooo, why? And how did that affect him? And how the HELL am I going to make that funny... you'll see!

Anyway, that's been my last couple of days. Highs, lows, stress, relief. And I'm loving it. What have you all been up to?

------------

*Great exercise - try telling a story in 10 Slides paced to music, it's fascinating to see what an audience does and doesn't pick up about your story (on one viewing) and why. One of the best learning experiences so far in the course. Every film-maker should watch and evaluate as many as possible. Our slide show, it's produced in groups of two people, was really hit very hard by the people critiquing it. Appropriately we thought, we were trying to tell a hard story (which I wrote - ooops, my fault). We shot for the stars and missed. Happily, the guy I did my slide-show with was given the position of Director on one of the three 16mm film productions. So our slide show can't have been too bad. I've since come to realise that if the people critiquing your piece are hammering it to pieces it means they see something in it. If they ask you no questions then they're bored and disinterested. They'll be expecting big things from me next semester when I do 16mm productions I'm sure.

**Sound technician is actually one of the hardest jobs on a documentary I've discovered. And I'm baaaad at it! Never underestimate the complexity of any role on any film production.

Uh Oh...

2007-08-25T10:37:00.000+10:00

**Graphic Material Warning**

The following video contains video of an

operation on the human face. A 'no go' if you're at all squeamish.

I haven't heard the audio on this video 'cause I'm at home but I think the surgery in the video is because of a tumour. Thankfully not why I'm about to go through this. No cancer is a good thing right? *sigh* Let's hope they don't snip the facial nerve by accident. I like being able to use my face. Luckily the guy performing the Op is considered one of the best specialists in Australia.

In better news, my Documentary pitch went swimmingly. Second in the class vote. Not bad considering I only had a week, compared to 4 weeks for everyone else, to prepare the idea. No thanks the the Royal National Parks there. Now I'm busy doing a full treatment on how I would shoot it. I do need an iconic Australian theatre for one of the scenes though... the lesson for the day, ASK. The management of one of Australias most beautiful and recognisable theatres, and my preferred venue, are thinking of approaching the internationally acclaimed show currently bumped into the venue to ask if I can film in the lobby of the building for a couple of hours one afternoon. How lovely is THAT! I'm very lucky with the people I meet. I hope the shows Producers are as kind as the Theatre's management. It'd be a Coup, a coup I tell you! But really, I'm excited by the idea because it would compliment perfectly the structure of my Documentary in a way a smaller venue couldn't. It'd speak volumes about my subject and his past, present, and future. Fingers crossed there as well everyone :)

That's it, I'll stop procrastinating on my Treatment now. Til next time.

Censorship

2007-08-17T09:27:00.000+10:00

Well, the New South Wales government has shut down my documentary idea. Censorship, censorship, I say! They think the subject matter, a bunch of shacks from the Great Depression, is a far too sensitive subject. Of course, now the shack owners are up in arms and in the process of putting together a formal protest (on paper).

Whoops, my little 4 -7 minute doco has really stirred up a hornets nest.

Of course, I don't have time for a hornets nest as I have to put together a doco proposal just to pass my course. The Shack owners have been wonderful in offering me interviews and so forth as an alternative to my original idea, an experimental piece in 'pictures with music' looking at the balance between Australian Heritage and the Environment, but I just cant do the new interview based doco justice in 4 to 7 minutes.

So now I feel like I've abandoned them... *hangs head in shame* I'm sorry! I will be back to do the doco as soon as I can. I really want to highlight these important pieces of Australian Heritage.

In other news, I shot a photo essay the other day that I think looks pretty great. I also spent last night putting it to music. It's meant to be about two people meeting in a public place using Mise en Scene to give meaning to the meeting. I grabbed a couple of friends who've just had a baby and enacted her going into labour and giving birth with the help of her partner... in public... they were terribly brave and I can't thank them enough. It's called father meets son. The original meeting so to speak. Gawd I'm good! Oh, and so is the guy I've been working with... his ideas were brilliant and really added to the project.

What else, um, I'm dying... weird head lump that's making the specialists scratch their noggins in wonder... I don't have time to die. I'm far to busy making films. Join with me in telling 'Evil Richard', as we're calling the head lump, to piss off!

Til next time, chow!

I KNOW, I KNOW, GIVUS A BREAK...

2007-08-06T08:57:00.000+10:00

Where is he?

What's he doing?

Why doesn't he love us any more?

What's that odd smell?

Quiet down you lot. On top of work, I'm a freak'n student now. I thought I was going to be able to grow my hair long. Drink Schnapps whilst pondering the mysteries of life in a black skivvy. Make love to far too thin models from exotic climes to the sound of my own voice haughtily complaining about the Mise en Scene of her Italian decorated penthouse apartment.

But no...

Making films seems to be a lot of work. Who woulda thunk it? Well... me really. Outside of class time, when I'm not working, I've been trying to arrange three different projects to the point where I have enough information and credibility that will convince the school to let me turn the ideas into actual films.

My Doco idea, for I have to make a Doco this semester, is not something that's straight forward or easy but the idea, the story, and the characters involved are ones that I find compelling. Something I can definitely maintain interest in for the next 6 months. So I continue to liaise with four different groups of people, treading the fine balance between their own strongly felt belief systems and navigate their vastly varying bureaucracies. Try that whilst trekking in and out of these communities deep within the Aussie bush with no road access and an inherent suspicion of outsiders and then try to source 'free' archival footage and historical information on top of that. This project isn't easy, no, but I've been dogged and very, very lucky so far and I think by the time I pitch the idea to the school in a couple of weeks the inroads I've made so far will help convince them to make it a film.

...and that's only one of three projects.

So this is where I've been, and what I've been doing, and yes, of course I still love you peoples and I check the blogs as often as I can but bear with me if I don't post or comment often.

Until next time... keep watching the skies! What?

PS. Oh and the smell is me... Sorry... A lot of these remote communities don't have what you'd call 'modern facilities'.

I've been keeping myself busy...

2007-07-16T16:30:00.000+10:00

...with a Tank?

Yeah, OK, I wasn't even in town. I've been in Canblah (Canberra) visiting my brother, his wife and their new baby daughter.

Vlzerdko un Brun - Part 2

2007-07-04T15:07:00.000+10:00

Getting straight to it, we've made our mould and now we really want to make the puppets head.

Firsty you're going to need the best, and my favourite, product for making sure your final latex head will release from the mould.

That's right, get yourself a high quality Stoner. This particular Stoner is food grade so you know it's not going to damage you, the mould or the final head. If you yourself are a Stoner don't be tempted eat this stuff though, there's some chips in the cupboard. Just use the spray, one coat is usually enough, on inside and the top of the mould.

Then take some of this...

And do this...

Now, pre-thickened brushing latex is pretty, well, thick so make sure you get it into all the crevices of your mould leaving no air pockets. The latex will run so just rotate your mould in your hands until it's completely covered. For bigger moulds, hire a weight lifter or use a paint brush, which ever is cheaper or more desirable. I used a paint brush to make sure the inside of Brun's ears were completely covered with latex and had no air pockets. Word to the wise, buy a $40 camel hair paint brush because covering a paint brush with latex will ruin it within a few minutes and you'll feel like an idiot for not buying a set of cheap disposable paint brushes for the job. Well, at least I'd get to laugh at you... anyway... by the end of the process it should look something like this...

While you're waiting for that to dry, it'll only take a few hours depending on the thickness of the coat, the temperature and the humidity, grab some of these and cut them into thin strips.

Your work space will probably be a little messy after all this artsy stuff

so you might want to use the left over chux to clean your place a little.

Yay, it's dry-ish, now, using a CHEAP paint brush (Ha!) and some more latex and brush the chux strips onto the inside of your now latex coated mould.

The strips will stick to the inside and give the head structural integrity,
rigidity, um, make it less bendy.

You may want to do a few chux layers depending on the size of your head. The bigger the head, the more layers. Basically you're trying to make sure the head can support it's own weight, like this...

Give it a little trim and you'll have an ugly lump of latex in the shape of your puppets head.

Ummm, what next, oh yeah, the dude needs a nose. You can make one out of clay but I recommend this polymer clay modelling compound.

It's kinda expensive but totally worth it. After you've made the nose (or any other object you want I guess) you bake it in an ordinary oven (130ºC (275ºF) for 15mins per 6mm (1/4inch) of thickness) and it hardens to a porcelain like material that can be sanded, carved, drilled and painted. It's pretty neat stuff. Anyway, enough salesman-ship, make the damn nose.

Thank you.

I attached the nose using a piece of thin wire pushed through the latex head and into the nose. I tried it on the head before baking the nose to make sure it fit and so there was a hole in the end of the nose for the wire to fit into when putting it on the head for real. A small dab of super glue will hold the final baked nose to the wire. Like this...

Now he's pretty much done, but really ugly... use a sharp knife and cut his mouth open (oooouch!) then get some Acrylic paint mixed with a good portion of (brush ruining) latex...

...and paint that sucker until he's, like, totally gorgeous... or something... at least make sure you use lots of painty/latex mixture around his nose to make sure it's bonds to the main part of the head. You can also make some teeth out of Sculpey and super-glue them to the inside of the mouth.

I know the paint looks rough but that's how I wanted it.

There are ways of making is as smooth as you want.

That's totally enough for now. I'll probably do another post on the body, clothes and the controls for the head ('cause his mouth actually does work). So until next time (sometime in the year 2020 it would seem at this rate), have a good 4th of July and if you have any questions leave me a comment.

Vlzerdko un Brun

2007-06-13T13:53:00.000+10:00

So, before I spend the next two years of my school life working on *ahem* serious projects I wanted to do something a little frivolous and fun. As I've wanted to play with puppets again I came up with the idea of doing an episodal 'Punch and Judy' style puppet show set in a fictional Eastern Block country during the Communist era. After spending 15mins on the train ride to work writing the first script I thought I'd probably better design my characters, called Vlzerdko and Brun.

You don't need to be able to draw. I had an idea of what I wanted them to look like and scratched this onto a piece of paper in two minutes.

What to do now? Well, now you have to make them. There's a lot of different ways to make puppet heads. All puppets are kinda freaky (those dead eyes, eeep!) so no one way is better than any other and it really depends how you want your final puppets to look and what you're going to do with them. But the first step is always to make some original models that look like your pictures. I used a White Raku clay for my orginals because not only does it keep it's form and properties as it dries but it's also one of the cheapest modelling mediums you can find. Cheap means you can make lots of mistakes, so have FUN!

The blank head for Vlzerdko

The blank head for Brun, I've left his nose off for reasons that should become obvious later.

I decided on making latex heads because it meant they would be light, I could bash the things around 'Punch and Judy' style and they wouldn't get too damaged, and it would be easier to make their mouths move as latex stretches like skin. Latex is particularly easy to remove from complex moulds because of ability to stetch and compress which means for these heads I could use what I call a one piece slush mould. What is a one piece slush mould? Stop being so impatient, you'll find out shortly.

Once you're satisfied with your clay models, which may take minutes, hours or days (there's no rush or time limit), you need to start creating your moulds. It's really kinda easy. Take some more clay roll it into flat slabs and build walls around your clay models.

Make sure these are water tight.
This was the issue that caused my 3rd character, the factory owner, to die because
the wall broke and leaked litres of wet plaster all over my studio (not pictured).

Next, wash the clay off your hands 'cause you're about to get them covered in plaster.

Good quality pottery plaster, a bucket and some water is all you need.

Now, plaster making is the part that most mould makers will go on and on about because the plaster is going to be your final mould. They really should get over themselves, it's a simple process. Get enough water to fill the wall up to the top... um... guesstimate! Then, take the powered plaster and start dumping it into the water. Keep going. Once the powdered plaster is above the level of the water, like a little island, stop. The water will creep up through the island and cause it to crumble into the water (oh the humanity!), which means you need more plaster in the water. So put some more in. Keep doing this until the water no longer destroys your island. Yay, the villagers are saved... no they're not, this means your plaster to water ratio is perfect. With your HANDS, start mixing the plaster/water mix thoroughly until it's silky smooth and there are no lumps. Within a few minutes the plaster becomes thicker and warmer. The temperature change is important because it indicates the chemical reaction which makes plaster hard is taking place. This is why you must mix with your hands. The moment you feel it getting warmer pour it over the clay model filling up the wall.

Leave it alone for a day or two and then take off the outer clay walls...

Uh-oh, A huge lump of plaster with a huge lump of clay stuck inside it!

Turn the mould over and VERY carefully and sloooooowly dig out the clay. Use soft tools, so you don't scratch the inside of your mould, and small amounts of water to soften the clay. This is the reason I didn't put Bruns nose on, to get the clay out of a shape like that would have been far too tedious, fiddley, and all the scraping inside the nose could scratch the mould or worse... crack it. Much easier to make a nose later and stick it on. Did I say this is a slow process... I meant boring... BORING I SAY! Be patient. The slush that was once your clay head will come out eventually... and you will have a finished mould.

How ironic... my mould got mold... *shrugs* makes no difference as you will soon see.

That's probably enough for one post. I'll show the process of using the moulds to make the latex puppet heads next time.

Hope everyone out here is cool. I'll swing by and see you cats sometime soon.

Fleshlumpeater

2007-06-01T13:45:00.000+10:00

The BFG has always been on my top 5 films I would love to make. Of course, it's kind of hard in the climate of todays children's cinema to make a film about scary loin cloth wearing giants that make a daily habit of eating children from all over the world except Wellington (because of their boot-y flavour). Then there's the logistical problem of writing a script that is mostly one on one dialogue between the BFG and young Sofie that is filled with nonsensical banter playing on the written form of the English language. Ah well, I guess it'll be up to me to crack the formula and convince people to let me make it.

I still haven't gotten around to uploading anything of the puppet project I'm playing with at the moment. The puppets look pretty cool on the few camera tests I've done to make sure their mouth mechanisms work properly. Yep, their mouths work... well, one mouth works and one big nose and mustache that 'bobbles up and down effectively imitating someone talking' works. Now all they need is arms. I've only today received the 'blank' hand casts that I skived from a doll manufacturer (beg, borrow, and steal people... it's the only way to make films) so I'll start re-casting them into latex and working out the hand mechanisms this weekend. It'll should all be ready for shooting next weekend (or the one after) .

Hopefully the shoot and edit for the first episode wont take more than 4 weeks cause after that I'll BUSY. Yes busier than I am now. Busy learning, learning to produce/direct a documentary and learning the finer points of production design with the other newbies at the prestigious (*cough* *cough*) Sydney Film School. I haven't been a serious student since high school... gawd help me, how am I going to do two years of Uni... but in the film industry you need networks of people to do big projects and institutions of higher learning are a great place to pick up and refine ones skills while making those ever needed contacts. So I'm a tad nervous about the idea of having to convince people to make my films through a pitch process rather than just convincing myself and then making a film, but ultimately it's the nature of the industry and I'm keen as a savoury spread to start the course... at the soon to be prestigious, now I'm attending, Sydney Film School. (No really, they've got a brilliant track record of International Film Festival representation of their work. I wouldn't go there if they didn't).

I hope everyone else out here is doing well.

Oh... and that picture above was going to be so much more detailed but after 5 days I decided to cut it down and colour it 'cause I just couldn't get enough time to take it any further than this...

It's all about you.

2007-05-24T17:15:00.000+10:00

I'm still rather busy with all that work stuff so I haven't given much thought to writing anything here.

I have been to your blogs though. So instead of writing about what I'm doing, I'm going to write about you.

Yes you.

You know who you are, ... except for you, you don't even seem to know which way is up but that's probably because you're mother dropped you on your head, it's not your fault, this isn't about you so relax.

But you! Yeees, you! You are very disappointing, I've read your blog, why do you even bother? Each and every time I go there you are very disappointi, ... no, I don't mean you, you are more boring more than disappointing. I'm not going to even go into your boringness and the reasons why you shouldn't be allowed to liv... I said I wasn't talking about you. Your protestations of 'not being disappointing' when I've said that you are more boring than disappointing is boring. Maybe you should get off the blogs and live a little and you wouldn't be so boring.

I'm talking about YOU. ... What? Not this again, I don't mean you, you're clever and funny and never disappointing. You should write more posts. But the person behind you, hiding, yes YOU! You are frightfully disappointing, every time I go to your blog I see something that could be good but it just ends up petering out in a most disappointing fashion. ... I don't care if you can do better ... No, I'm never going to your blog again ... Because it's disappointing to see potential that never fruits ... No, I'm not giving you a second chance ... My expectations are NOT too high. I didn't even have any expectations when I started reading your stuff. It seemed fun, but now it's disappointing ... No, everyone thinks your stuff is rubbish ... Everyone ... No, EVERYONE! ... I don't care if you are me.

[No - this is not a pity post, just some shit I started typing and that was the simplest way I could finish it when it started boring me... disappointing... jokes! I'll do a real update soon... promise!]

Struggling...

2007-05-11T12:02:00.000+10:00

...to find anything of interest to post about. Works really busy, but I guess that's what happens when your organisation launches a $17M initiative to the public. No really, we DO love aged pensioners calling us because they don't have a computer to look up our website, we DO. Someone needs to hug the old buggers because it's obvious no-one but us is talking to them. I mean, I understand your grand-daughter is playing rugby today but what does that have to do with us?

Not that there hasn't been some fun stuff going on, it's just not post worthy or ready for posting yet. I've started making some puppets for a series of shorts I'm producing. I've been videoing the procedure so I may put it up sometime. I'm making the heads from 'bendy-stretchy stuff' (technical term! OK, I just didn't want to use the word latex and have all the mature people here go off the rails). I've been doing a lot of character design, modelling, slush casting, etc. I have a beautiful example on tape of what happens when you screw up a plaster casting, the clay casting wall broke not once, but twice! It turned into a plaster fountain sending litres of liquid plaster all over my work bench, the floor, my camera tripod and me. I'm not sure I'll post that though, it's mostly me just scrambling to get something to contain the plaster while laughing my arse off. Very fun and messy work.

The series itself has a communist era Eastern European feel to it so I've been traipsing through a lot of material produced during that era. Here's a piece I found that, in my opinion, is nothing like what I'm producing but absolutely beautiful.

Hope everyone has a great weekend. Must go, I have a pensioner on the phone who's telling me about a boating trip they took in 1954. Please people, help me out, if your parents are aged, give them a bloody call and take some interest in their life. Hopefully they wont feel the need to call me.

Animated Monday

2007-05-07T12:45:00.000+10:00

Well, the Bard of Arth has done it again. With the flick of his wrist, a month of grind, unabashed animal cruelty, and the occasional Jedi mind trick he has created quite the show for us animation loving geekoids.

Definitely head over and check out the goodness that is Arthbard's Science Center!

------------------------------------------------

...And now for a random image courtesy of some crazy-smart programmer-type dude who appears to think google enjoys being re-engineered. I actually wonder if this will work...

[update]...Wow, what a not-so crazy-smart programmer-type dude. All that did was make the page un-loadable in some browsers. The idea should have been a fun one though. Apparently it was supposed to capture random words on your blog and then insert a random image from google image search using those words

...so here's some random image courtesy of crazy-smart me-type dude who appears to think that typing a random word in google image search is mildly amusing...

I was hungry OK!

So I can't draw...

2007-05-01T18:12:00.000+10:00

...next you'll be saying I can't paint!

(Acrylic on Board. 1300x1000mm)

Errrrr, OK, you're probably right but as long as the red stickers keep turning up I'll ignore the fact.

A quick picture from my lunch hour...

2007-04-27T15:26:00.000+10:00

REALITY OR IMAGINATION?

Does it matter if you can answer,

Have a nice weekend!

I'm Scared. Hold Me!

2007-04-26T10:31:00.000+10:00

I receive a lot of innoxious mail; Buy my printer, Want cheaper consumables, Look at our specials... you may as well send me a piece of paper with 'Please Recycle' printed all over it. If I want to buy equipment or change a (well thought through) procurement arrangement then I'll research it and your stupid hey-look-I-killed-another-forest piece of paper isn't going to effect my decision whatsoever.

But the other day I got this:

Crikey, Yes I am! Is some kindly terrorist organisation letting me know about an imminent attack? Is some kind of Godzilla-type monster about to erupt from beneath the Sydney Harbour Bridge and kill us all? Is the Council letting us know about a Harbour Bridge rock concert complete with pyrotechnics show? I have to know! With trepidacious fingers, I know, even my fingers were afraid at the thought of an over-rated Rock Trio unleashed on the RED ZONE, I turned the card over...

[I have removed contact details and names in case police are investigating the
picture of the scary looking women who has obviously smashed her child's head into a window]

Oh. My. God. In a state of small-yipping-dog-like-panic I quickly ran about the office to see if any of our windows might cause unimaginable human casualties. And let me tell you, none, I repeat, none of our windows had the necessary protection. Aghast, I fired off an email as soon as I could calm myself enough to consider sitting still;

-----Original Message-----
From: Rich
Sent: Wednesday, 25 April 2007 7:20 PM
To: ['Your Going To Explode Any Second' Glass Suppliers]
Subject: Oh God, HELP!

Dear [Fear Mongers]

I am in the Red Zone and was certainly part of the many who were completely unaware that "Glass becomes like flying razor blades" in the event of an out of control suicide bomber.

Firstly, I would like thank you for your timely warning for had you not so unselfishly shared this information with our office we may have remained ignorant of these troubling bomb detonation statistics. I'm sure we all agree that ignorance in whatever form should not be tolerated.

Secondly, our internal procedures call for this type of capital works to be placed to tender, with a minimum of three respondee's, and as you can imagine the tender process takes a while to put in place, to have tenders ratified, and for work to be completed. So if you could let us know when the attack might take place and if it is before you can install the Safety Window Film I will, for staff safety, close the office that day.

I also noted that you supply a free CD. Can you please send the CD and any other information you have on bomb detonation to our office as soon as possible. As some of our staff would prefer not to hear anecdotal stories or see images of people affected by glass shattering ten blocks from an explosion could you include an index with the CD so that I may direct those staff members from the room during the presentation of such material.

I am most anxious for your response.

Sincerely

Rich, etc...

They haven't responded yet, which leaves me feeling most anxious indeed, but I'll be sure to let people know if they do. ARE YOU IN THE RED ZONE?

Changing the subject...

2007-04-19T12:45:00.000+10:00

So I was chatting to my Vietnam born Aussie now Dutch friend the other day who is about to return with her hubbie to Oz to have their first child. Exciting! Well, probably exciting. I'm not up to speed on the whole 'seed of my loins' thing, I'm sure it's somehow enjoyable for those who really want to do it... to me they're pretty much 'crazy breeders, Breeeeeders!'. I jest, I'm very happy for them. Breeeeeders!

Anyway, so we're chatting away, 'Blah, Blah, Blah, Ultrasound, Blah, Blah, Blah, Stretch Marks, Blah, Blah, Blah... I'm actually a hell of a lot more interested than this sentence makes out...' and we started talking about drug free birthing and the idea of self hypnosis. The idea's kinda cool and I guess if it doesn't really work she'll have something to keep her drug free self occupied while another living being painfully claws it's way out from her vagina. So, being the good friend I am, the following day I decided to do a web search for 'Self Hypnosis' to try and track down something she could use.

After a good half hour I found something free and thought I'd listen to it before forwarding it on. Good idea! The initial 'relaxing' techniques were OK. Kinda reminds me of a meditation technique used in Tai-Chi except instead of subconsciously training your body to kick-ass you get to have a nice lay down. So I kicked on through to listen to the 'self hypnosis affirmations'. I expected stuff like, 'As you breathe you let go of your pain' or, 'you can kill your husband later for putting his dick in you', or whatever it is pregnant women have difficulty with when giving birth.

But no, after the usual, 'now I'm going to count backwards slowly and when I say "sleep" you will be completely relaxed and open... now sleep, blah, blah, blah 3, 2, 1', I get this, 'you are now completely relaxed, you now realise the world is abundant and you deserve to be wealthy, now amplify that feeling, like a light becoming brighter and brighter, you make the most of your life by making yourself rich, and everyone around is happy to see you rich and successful..." and it goes on like that for another 5 minutes before getting to anything to do with birthing. I mean, Bleed'n Hell, I know child rearing is expensive but that's just creepy! Especially with the low soothing voice and new-age tranquil music in the background.

Is it just me or do other people find this really Creeeepy?

On a completely unrelated topic, here's another Gif, just relax and watch the Gif for a couple of minutes...

as I count backwards from five you will feel you legs getting lighter, 5, the weightless sensation is slowly moving up your legs and into your body and head, 4, your eye lids are now becoming heavier and you are completely relaxed, 3, your breathing is becoming deeper, 2, you can no longer feel your body and you are free from the restraints from the world, 1, and sleep... NOW INVEST IN MY FILMS, SEND ME YOUR MONEY, ALL OF IT, NO, EVEN BETTER, QUACK LIKE A DUCK, HAHAHAHA, QUACK YOU BASTARDS, QUACK!!!!!

I guess it's good to look at the motivations of anything or anybody that is attempting to tap into your subconscious.